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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that it is better to spend more money to buy good-quality products that last a long time. Others think that it is better to buy cheaper products, even if they may not last as long. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There is an ongoing debate about the best type of
products
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 consumers should purchase .
While
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 some
individuals
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 are of the
opinion
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 that buying
quality
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items
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 that have longer lifespans is better than spending
money
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 on purchasing lesser
quality
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 goods that are cheap and less durable,others think
otherwise
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. In my
opinion
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, I believe that purchasing
quality
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 durable
products
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 that are expensive is better because
people
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 will be able to get value for their
money
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 and
also
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 gain a good reputation.
This
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 essay will explore both views and give a concluding
opinion
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. On the one hand, some believe that it is better to spend more
money
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 on buying cheaper
products
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 even if they do not
last
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 long because they think that the trend of goods tends to
change
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 rapidly and there is no point holding onto an item that will soon become outdated.
People
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 would be able to
change
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 to the latest version of
products
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 even though they are not original anytime the
items
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 get spoilt .
For example
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, the fashion industry often releases new designs and styles of clothes and the majority of
people
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 who buy cheaper clothes are able to
change
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 easily when compared to those
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 buy expensive ones.
Furthermore
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, these
individuals
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also
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 believe that
products
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 that are of lesser
quality
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 are more affordable and they do not have to spend a lot of their income on buying expensive
products
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instead
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 they divert it to other things . To them just owning the
items
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 brings enough satisfaction irrespective of the
quality
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.
On the other hand
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, some
individuals
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 believe that when consumers buy
quality
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products
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 they are able to
use
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 them for a longer duration
therefore
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 they enjoy the worth of the
money
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 they spend. They are usually guaranteed that the
items
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 bought will not damage easily.
For instance
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, most
people
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 who buy cheap bags or shoes often complain that the leather or material used in producing the bag or shoe peels off easily within weeks when compared to those who bought branded
products
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.
Additionally
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,
people
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 think that buying
quality
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products
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 brings rest of mind because consumers will not have to
change
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 these
items
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 frequently and eventually end up spending a lot of
money
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 and feeling frustrated. In my
opinion
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,
people
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 should spend
money
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 on purchasing
quality
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products
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 because when they
use
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 these goods they leave a good impression in the minds of others. When
people
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 meet them for the first time they address them with respect because of the type of
products
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 they are using .Social class are often assessed based on the
quality
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 of
products
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people
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 wear or
use
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therefore
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people
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 should opt for
quality
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products
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 if they can afford them because it is better to have few
quality
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 things than to have a lot of cheap
items
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 that are not durable and doesn’t present one's social call well . In conclusion, some
people
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 think that buying less expensive
items
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 that do not
last
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 long is better than buying
quality
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products
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 because they believe that there is often a rapid
change
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 in the trend of
products
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 and
also
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 because of affordability.I believe that
individuals
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 should always buy
quality
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items
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 even though they are more expensive because they
last
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 long and
also
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 allow
people
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 to enjoy the worth of their
money
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.
People
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 are
also
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 addressed properly anytime they
use
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 branded
items
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.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph clearly links to the next with appropriate linking words or phrases to improve overall flow.
task achievement
Try to use more varied sentence structures to enhance clarity and engagement.
task achievement
Include more diverse examples to support your arguments more comprehensively.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced discussion of both perspectives, showing a comprehensive understanding of the task.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the topic and presents a clear thesis statement.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and restates the writer’s opinion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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