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Writing Samples
Band 6

Machines are taking over more and more jobs previously done by humans. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages and give your opinion.

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The rise of
automation
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 and artificial intelligence has heralded a transformative era in the
job
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 market, with
machines
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 increasingly supplanting
roles
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 traditionally performed by humans.
This
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 paradigm shift brings forth a myriad of
benefits
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 and challenges that merit thorough examination.
While
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 the efficiency and cost-effectiveness of
machines
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 are indeed advantageous, the repercussions for the human
workforce
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 cannot be overlooked.
This
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 essay will explore both the merits and drawbacks of
this
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 phenomenon before articulating a personal viewpoint. One of the primary advantages of
machines
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 taking over jobs is the significant enhancement in productivity and efficiency.
Automation
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 allows tasks to be completed far more quickly and accurately than human
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
 could achieve.
For instance
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, in manufacturing industries,
machines
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 can operate 24/7 without the need for breaks or vacations, which not only accelerates production but
also
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 reduces operational costs.
This
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 efficiency often translates into lower prices for consumers, fostering economic growth.
Additionally
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,
machines
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 can perform dangerous tasks, thereby safeguarding human
workers
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 from hazardous environments. The mining and construction industries,
for example
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, have benefitted tremendously from robotic technologies that can undertake risky operations without endangering human lives.
Conversely
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, the displacement of human
workers
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due to
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automation
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 poses significant challenges. As
machines
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 increasingly assume
roles
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 once held by people, economic inequality may become exacerbated. A decline in
job
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 opportunities can lead to widespread unemployment, disproportionately affecting low-skilled
workers
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 who may struggle to transition into new
roles
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 that demand advanced technical skills.
For example
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, retail cashier positions are rapidly diminishing as companies adopt self-checkout systems, leaving many
workers
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 in precarious financial situations.
Moreover
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, the psychological implications of
job
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 loss can lead to diminished self-esteem and increased anxiety among those affected. Critics argue that
this
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 creates a societal imbalance and that the economic
benefits
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 of
automation
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 do not equally benefit all strata of society. In addressing the disadvantages, it is crucial to consider potential solutions that could ameliorate the situation. Governments and educational institutions must collaborate to upskill and reskill the
workforce
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, equipping
workers
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 with the necessary competencies to thrive in a technology-driven economy. Programs focusing on technology training can enable
workers
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 to transition into
roles
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 that complement
automation
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 rather than compete with it.
For instance
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, individuals trained in
maintenance
Correct article usage
the maintenance
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 and programming of automated systems will remain indispensable in a landscape dominated by machinery. Ultimately, the emphasis on education and adaptability can mitigate the adverse effects of
job
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 displacement. In conclusion,
while
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 the encroachment of
machines
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 into the
workforce
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 brings notable efficiencies and operational advantages, it simultaneously instigates pressing socio-economic challenges. The dichotomy of
benefits
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 and pitfalls underscores the need for proactive strategies that ensure a balanced coexistence between human
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
 and
automation
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. By fostering an education system attuned to the demands of the future
job
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 market, society can harness the full potential of technological advancements
while
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 minimizing the negative repercussions for displaced
workers
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. Ultimately, a conscientious approach will enable us to embrace the
benefits
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 of
this
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 transformation without forsaking the human element within the
workforce
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.

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task achievement
Expand on the solutions proposed to reinforce how the negative impacts of automation can be managed. While the ideas presented are strong, providing more detailed examples or case studies could further enrich the essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next by occasionally using linking phrases or sentences. This can help maintain a seamless flow between ideas and sections.
task achievement
The essay presents a comprehensive and balanced view on the topic, consistently exploring both the advantages and disadvantages of automation before presenting a well-reasoned personal opinion.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly articulated, providing insight into the essay's content and effectively summing up the argument and proposed solutions.
task achievement
The use of examples such as the impact on the manufacturing and retail industries strengthens the argument and illustrates the main points effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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