Some pople think certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work intead of bering put behind bars. To what extend do you agree?

#pople #prisoners #community #work #intead #bars

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Some people believe that

prisoners

Use synonyms

should do some unpaid

work

Use synonyms

for the

community

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of staying behind bars. I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

viewpoint because it allows

prisoners

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to feel like a part of the

community

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, and they can gain some experiences.

Prisoners

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feel that they are a part of the

community

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because of their unpaid

work

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. As

prisoners

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remain isolated from society because of their deeds,

community

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work

Use synonyms

helps to eliminate that feeling of isolation in them. If they engage themselves in unpaid

community

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work

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, they will have that feeling that they have done some wrong, and they are paying back to the

community

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through their unpaid

work

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For example

Linking Words

, in Australia,

prisoners

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engage in gardening and cleaning the streets of the

community

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without payment, and

this

Linking Words

work

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helps them to contribute to the

community

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Moreover

Linking Words

, unpaid

community

Use synonyms

work

Use synonyms

allows

prisoners

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to gain some experience. When their punishment

will be

Wrong verb form

show examples

fulfilled, they will find

jobs

Use synonyms

with the help of

that

Correct determiner usage

those

show examples

experiences. Voluntary

community

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work

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will prepare them for the job market, and help them to earn their livelihood. If they can secure

jobs

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with voluntary experiences, there are fewer chances of engaging in crime again.

For example

Linking Words

, in Japan,

prisoners

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work

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a certain period of their imprisonment in the local

community

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. They construct buildings and with that experience, they find

jobs

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after completing their imprisonments. In conclusion, I completely agree that

prisoners

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should

work

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voluntarily in the

community

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. They feel themselves as a part of the

community

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through their

work

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Moreover

Linking Words

, with

this

Linking Words

experience, they find

jobs

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in the future.

Submitted by rahman_rehana on Thu Oct 24 2024

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task achievement

While the essay is clear and on-topic, adding a counterargument could show deeper analysis.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly with transitional phrases to guide the reader through your argument.

coherence cohesion

The introduction clearly states your viewpoint and sets up the structure of the essay well.

task achievement

You consistently provide relevant examples to support your arguments, which strengthens your task response.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance and addresses the main points discussed.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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Some pople think certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work intead of bering put behind bars. To what extend do you agree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Obesity is an ever-growing pandemic that is affecting more and more of the world’s population. The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth of overweight people in society? How can this issue be resolved?

Nowadays, more and more children are being brought up in single parent families. What are the causes of this? What effects can be seen as a result of this?

Compared to the past, more people are now studying abroad because it is more convenient and cheaper than before. Do you think this is beneficial to the foreign student’s home country? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Some people think that sport teacheas chealdren how to compete,while others believe that children learn team work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Over the last few decades, the media has promoted the image of young thin women as being ideal. what problem has this caused? what solution can you suggest to this issue?