some people believe that scientific research should be hold and controlled by the government instead of alwoing private companies. to what extend do u agree or disagree?

There is an ongoing debate
whether
Change preposition
about whether
show examples
scientific studies should be managed solely by the
government
or if private sectors should be permitted to conduct research independently.In my view, a balanced approach where
the
Correct article usage
apply
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government
oversight and the private
recearch
Correct your spelling
research
are permitted is the most effective. The following paragraphs will explore both perspectives.
To begin
with, scientific research facilities
shoud
Correct your spelling
should
primarly
Correct your spelling
primarily
be overseen by the
government
.
This
is because unauthorized facilities may engage in risky or illegal activities without the acknowledgement of the authorities.
For instance
, some sectors
intially
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initially
registered as research facilities,
then
additionally
discovered to be producing and distributing illegal
substance
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substances
show examples
.
Therefore
, it is
essencial
Correct your spelling
essential
that the
government
regulate these spaces to ensure compliance with national laws and public safety.
On the other hand
,
although
government
oversight is important,
scientists
often feel
pressered
Correct your spelling
pressured
pressure
pressed
under constant supervision, which can hinder their productivity.
Additionally
, many
scientists
prefer to work in quiet, independent environments to maintain focus.
For example
, a study at Oxford
university
Capitalize word
University
show examples
found that researchers' performance significantly decreased when they were closely monitored.
As a result
, allowing
scientists
to conduct
reseach
Correct your spelling
research
in private areas can
creat
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create
show examples
a more productive and comfortable atmosphere. In conclusion,
while
it is essential for
scientists
to have some independence in their work,
governments
Change the noun form
government
show examples
oversight
remain
Correct subject-verb agreement
remains
show examples
cricial
Correct your spelling
crucial
critical
to ensure safety and adherence to national regulations. Ultimately, a balanced approach that combines freedom for researchers with periodic
monitor
Replace the word
monitoring
show examples
by authorities can promote both innovation and public safety.
Submitted by miss batool on

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task achievement
Ensure clarity in your ideas and arguments. Some points can be elaborated more specifically to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structures and avoid repetitive phrases for better engagement and readability.
coherence cohesion
Check for minor spelling and grammatical errors to enhance the essay's professionalism.
task achievement
The essay offers a balanced approach to the topic, presenting both sides of the argument thoroughly.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured, with a clear introduction and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph introduces a distinct idea, contributing to the overall flow and readability of the essay.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • scientific research
  • socially responsible outcomes
  • corporate profit
  • profit motives
  • fundamental areas
  • long-term societal development
  • innovative research outcomes
  • mixed approach
  • stifle innovation
  • bureaucratic processes
  • breakthrough projects
  • commercial gain
  • scientific progress
  • public access
  • government funding
  • private sector
  • public benefit
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