Currently children have less responsibilities than they had in the past some say this is a good change some argue that it had negative effect on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion based on your personal experience.

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Nowadays changes in our society have affected how youngsters are educated,

therefore

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, they are less responsible.

As a result

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, recently there has been a heated debate about whether

this

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is a good thing for them or not. On the one hand, having fewer responsibilities results in better psychological development.

According to

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researchers, when kids are able to play freely and stay with their friends, they have less probability of suffering from anxiety or depression when becoming adults.

This

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due to

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the fact that by playing and socializing the neurons of the brain's areas deputed to social interactions and language develop more,

while

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serotonin receptors increase their number in the limbic cortex reducing the incidence of the mental illnesses previously mentioned.

Thus

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, in the future, they are more likely to become part of the society and live a fulfilling life.

On the other hand

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, kids

this

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way are less reliable and tend to take fewer risks, which is fundamental for them to grow. Recent studies have proven that the reason is that it was mandatory for our ancestors to have risky behaviours from an early age. In fact, youngsters used to take part in haunting huge animals

such

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as mammoths or lions,

instead

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, today the biggest risk they take is to send a message to their crush.

Hence

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, these behaviours influence how young adults are in a working environment, where they appear to have less leadership and ability to decision making. In conclusion, I believe that in

this

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situation the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. I think we as humanity are no longer animals, so we have to improve how we educate our prole.

For example

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, we should train them to make decisions and take on responsibilities gradually and politely, so that no trauma occurs and they can learn useful skills without stressing them.

alessandro.taleseTue Oct 29 2024

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task achievement

Strengthen your use of relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. While you have cited research and studies, providing more concrete examples could enhance your argument effectively.

coherence cohesion

Improve the connectivity between sentences by using a greater variety of cohesive devices. This will enhance the overall flow and clarity of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the issue discussed, providing a clear stance and summarization of main points.

task achievement

The essay provides a complete response to the prompt by discussing both perspectives and offering a personal viewpoint.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

303 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Responsibilities
Extracurricular activities
Well-rounded development
Hobbies
Stress
Pressure
Creative
Curious
Life skills
Problem-solving
Time management
Independence
Entitlement
Dependency
Challenges
Discipline
Balanced development

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Currently children have less responsibilities than they had in the past some say this is a good change some argue that it had negative effect on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion based on your personal experience.

Your opinion

People living in the 21st century have a better quality of life than the previous centuries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays,many people choose to be self-employed,rather than to work for a company or organisation.why might this be the case?what could be the disadvantage of being self-employed?

Nowadays, the most important task is the environmental protection of our planet for future generations. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Deforestation caused by human activity is happening in many parts of the world, with serious results for the enviroment. What do you think can be done to solve this problem?