Currently children have less responsibilities than they had in the past some say this is a good change some argue that it had negative effect on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion based on your personal experience.
Nowadays changes in our society have affected how youngsters are educated,
therefore
, they are less responsible. As a result
, recently there has been a heated debate about whether this
is a good thing for them or not.
On the one hand, having fewer responsibilities results in better psychological development. According to
researchers, when kids are able to play freely and stay with their friends, they have less probability of suffering from anxiety or depression when becoming adults. This
is due to
the fact that by playing and socializing the neurons of the brain's areas deputed to social interactions and language develop more, while
serotonin receptors increase their number in the limbic cortex reducing the incidence of the mental illnesses previously mentioned. Thus
, in the future, they are more likely to become part of the society and live a fulfilling life.
On the other hand
, kids this
way are less reliable and tend to take fewer risks, which is fundamental for them to grow. Recent studies have proven that the reason is that it was mandatory for our ancestors to have risky behaviours from an early age. In fact, youngsters used to take part in haunting huge animals such
as mammoths or lions, instead
, today the biggest risk they take is to send a message to their crush. Hence
, these behaviours influence how young adults are in a working environment, where they appear to have less leadership and ability to decision making.
In conclusion, I believe that in this
situation the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. I think we as humanity are no longer animals, so we have to improve how we educate our prole. For example
, we should train them to make decisions and take on responsibilities gradually and politely, so that no trauma occurs and they can learn useful skills without stressing them.Submitted by alessandro.talese on
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task achievement
Strengthen your use of relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. While you have cited research and studies, providing more concrete examples could enhance your argument effectively.
coherence cohesion
Improve the connectivity between sentences by using a greater variety of cohesive devices. This will enhance the overall flow and clarity of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the issue discussed, providing a clear stance and summarization of main points.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the prompt by discussing both perspectives and offering a personal viewpoint.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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