It is not necessary for people to travel to other places to learn about the culture.We can learn as much as from boks, films, and the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
In
this
modern era, many individuals are interested to learn
about the Change preposition
in learning
culture
and tradition
especially
after Add the comma(s)
, especially
post-covid
. Some folks concur that Correct your spelling
post-COVID
knows
about other Correct subject-verb agreement
know
culture
only by visiting Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
to
other places Remove the preposition
apply
while
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
are rejecting
Wrong verb form
reject
this
notion. I will elaboration
Replace the word
elaborate
both
views and Change preposition
on both
thus
lead to a logical conclusion.
First of all, many people
are interested to travel
other places and spending quality time with other Verb problem
apply
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
people
by sharing their knowledge and learning a
new Correct article usage
apply
skill
from them. To probe more deeply, Fix the agreement mistake
skills
for instance
, recently i
visited to Change the capitalization
I
himalayas
with my friends, Change the capitalization
Himalayas
Correct word choice
and spend
spend
more 10 days with local Wrong verb form
spent
people
. During our stay, they requested us to participate in one of their festival
. They wore their Change to a plural noun
festivals
tradition
dress and Replace the word
traditional
dance
Wrong verb form
danced
for
the Change preposition
to
tradition
music. I learnt so much about their Replace the word
traditional
culture
and tradition
. I even learnt their
Change preposition
about their
tradition
Replace the word
traditional
cook
food. Wrong verb form
cooked
Hence
, it is apparent that all point
are in good stead.
Fix the agreement mistake
points
On the other hand
, people
who are not in
Change preposition
apply
financial
good, want to learn about other Change the word
financially
culture
, they can learn from films, Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
book
and Fix the agreement mistake
books
Correct article usage
the internet
internet
. Capitalize word
Internet
For instance
, britain
man Correct word choice
if a British
want
to know about Correct subject-verb agreement
wants
indian
Change the capitalization
Indian
culture
, he can watch live video
or other media to get knowledge about it, Fix the agreement mistake
videos
we
can learn more Correct word choice
and we
depth
Correct your spelling
in-depth
detail
about other Fix the agreement mistake
details
culture
.
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
To sum up
, by visiting the
other Correct article usage
apply
place
, Fix the agreement mistake
places
people
can experience and learn about other culture
more Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
efficitent
than Correct your spelling
effectively
books
and news. Change preposition
through books
Consequently
, I frimly
agree with the former statement.Correct your spelling
firmly
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on
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Grammar
Work on improving grammar and sentence structure to make your ideas clearer. For example, ensure subject-verb agreement and use of articles are correct, such as 'people are interested in learning' instead of 'interested to learn'.
Development
Develop your points more fully and explain your examples more thoroughly. For instance, expand on why participating in a festival helped you understand the culture better.
Balance in Argument
Try to address both sides of the argument equally to show consideration for each perspective more robustly. Your essay could benefit from elaborating on the counter-argument.
Use of Examples
You provided a personal example, which makes the essay more engaging and relatable.
Structure
You included a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in guiding the reader through the essay.
Task Relevance
The essay remains focused on the main topic throughout without deviating to irrelevant points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.