More and more people are moving from rural areas to live in cities. What problems can this cause? How can these problems be solved? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
A
lot
of Use synonyms
people
argue and choose to Use synonyms
move
Use synonyms
live
from Rephrase
apply
side
cities Use synonyms
area
to live in cities. I believe Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
have personal Use synonyms
reason
to do that, Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
Linking Words
while
that has negative impacts or Correct word choice
but
problems
. After Use synonyms
problems
which given by the citizens for moving their Use synonyms
live
in Replace the word
life
city
, I Use synonyms
also
believe that has some way to solve the Linking Words
prople
to do not Correct your spelling
people
problem
move
their Use synonyms
live
from Replace the word
life
rural
Add an article
a rural
the rural
area
.
As said above, that Use synonyms
have
some Correct subject-verb agreement
has
problems
if a Use synonyms
lot
of Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
move
from Use synonyms
rural
Add an article
a rural
the rural
Use synonyms
area
to live in Fix the agreement mistake
areas
Use synonyms
city
, Add an article
the city
a city
,
Change the punctuation
apply
while
the Linking Words
people
who want to Use synonyms
move
Use synonyms
their
live in Correct pronoun usage
apply
Use synonyms
city
like once in Correct article usage
the city
the
blue moon. First for Correct article usage
a
problem
that will make when the Add an article
a problem
the problem
people
Use synonyms
move
from Use synonyms
Use synonyms
side
Add an article
the side
city
Use synonyms
area
, that will make their village in Use synonyms
there
place is Correct your spelling
their
aboneded
. It is because anyone who Correct your spelling
bonded
live
there Change the verb form
lives
are leave
and Wrong verb form
leaves
make
the place Change the verb form
makes
does
not Verb problem
apply
cleaned
and structured. Change the verb form
clean
Moreover
, in the cities which places liven by the Linking Words
people
after Use synonyms
Use synonyms
move
from Add an article
a move
the move
Use synonyms
side
Add an article
the side
city
Use synonyms
area
, that will be crowded Use synonyms
also
full, like some water which Linking Words
moven
from glass one to other glass and pointed in one glass.
Correct your spelling
moves
moved
move
Furthermore
, I believe that have some Linking Words
solution
to solve the Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
problems
. Use synonyms
Firstly
, their government should visit the rural Linking Words
area
or their village condition, maybe there has some problem and made a Use synonyms
lot
of Use synonyms
people
who live there Use synonyms
are
do not feel Unnecessary verb
apply
live
Replace the word
life
comfortly
. Correct your spelling
comfortably
Moreover
, Linking Words
for
make the Change preposition
to
people
who live in Use synonyms
Use synonyms
side
Correct your spelling
the
city
Use synonyms
area
feel enjoy, the government should build some Use synonyms
building
or Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
park
there, to make the Fix the agreement mistake
parks
citizen
live Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
with
Change preposition
apply
comfortly
. The government must care with their citizens and make them happy Correct your spelling
comfortably
live
there Change the form of the verb
living
while
in rural Linking Words
Use synonyms
area
. Fix the agreement mistake
areas
Secondly
, some Linking Words
people
who want to Use synonyms
move
their live in Use synonyms
city
should think again about that, how the affect to their live and other Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
live
.
Correct subject-verb agreement
lives
To conclude
Linking Words
that
, that have some Correct word choice
apply
problems
Use synonyms
from
the case Change preposition
in
if
a Correct your spelling
of
lot
of Use synonyms
people
who live in rural Use synonyms
Use synonyms
area
and want to Fix the agreement mistake
areas
move
live in Use synonyms
Use synonyms
city
. I believe if the solutions that given by me, the problem will solved and clear.Add an article
the city
a city
Submitted by millionmiles.indonesia on
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task achievement
To increase your score in task achievement, make sure your response completely addresses all parts of the task. Include relevant examples to underline your points.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on ensuring that your ideas flow logically. Make sure your paragraphs clearly link to one another and use a range of linking phrases appropriately.
coherence cohesion
You have included both an introduction and a conclusion in your essay, which provides a nice structure.
task achievement
You have identified some key problems related to rural depopulation and have attempted to propose solutions, showing an understanding of the task.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example