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Children can learn effectively by watching television. Therefore, they shoud be encouraged to watch television regularly at home and at school . To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#children #television #shoud #home #school
As a contentious issue, watching television for
children
 in order to learn impressively
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 its opponents and
opposits
Correct your spelling
opposites
opposite
.
Whereas
, in my point of view its profounds exceed in many ways, both related merit and drawbacks are provided here. Grasping the opportunity
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
leaning
Correct your spelling
learning
show examples
esential
Correct your spelling
essential
 subjects by just watching TV is necessary for
children
. Pursuing the provided programs by
children
 experts would assist kids to not only build their basic numeral or literacy abilities but they would
also
aquire
Correct your spelling
require
acquire
 interpersonal abilities. To make it more clear, the
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
 that are provided for audiences with lower age
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 aimed their primary requirement,
such
 as making connections with others or
conting
Correct your spelling
counting
contain
 the number under ten.
Furthermore
, their talent may be found by their parents if they are more
appealed
Verb problem
attracted
show examples
 to a special program. To illustrate, it is possible to be more thrilled by following either cycling sports that are released by some special channels or
mthematic
Correct your spelling
mathematics
mathematic
thematic
 lessons that assist them to deal with their routine problems like paying for their
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
.
On the other hand
, some point out
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the probable disorders that can engage
children
.
For instance
, physical
shortage
Fix the agreement mistake
shortages
show examples
 like obesity and eye strain or
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
may hinder mental
developments
Fix the agreement mistake
development
show examples
,
lik
Correct your spelling
like
cognative
Correct your spelling
cognitive
 skills.
However
, by a controlled
Correct your spelling
schedule
schedual
Add a聽comma
schedual,
show examples
 neither physical nor mental problems would
occure
Correct your spelling
occur
 if other essential activities
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 included, like sports or attending traditional classrooms. Being the audience of inappropriate programs is another
consern
Correct your spelling
concern
 that has been claimed by some. Owing to the developments that
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 taken place regarding
children
's content, nowadays there are some professional channels with proper programs that
have
Verb problem
are
show examples
 aimed
special
Change preposition
at special
show examples
 ages.
To conclude
,
quiet
Correct your spelling
quite
show examples
 contrary to some individuals
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 believe watching television has some inaccetable effects on kids, to me, related benefits,
such
 as the opportunity
of learning
Change preposition
to learn
show examples
 vital issues like mathematics or interpersonal abilities conquer the mentioned demerits.
Submitted by drpnima on

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task achievement
The essay presents a relevant position on the topic, however, it should aim to develop its ideas further to achieve a more comprehensive response. For instance, you could explore more detailed examples or additional points of view to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay could improve in logical structure by ensuring a smoother progression between points. Consider using more transitional devices or linking words to guide the reader through your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument effectively.
task achievement
You presented some valid points and examples, such as the development of numeracy and literacy abilities through TV programs.

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