The diagram below shows how geothermal is used to produce electricity.

The provided diagram,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
depicts in great detail, illustrates the process of production of
electricity
from geothermal energy.
Overall
, it is clearly observable that the process of generating
electricity
through
this
method is done in 5 steps, starting with cold
water
pumping
as well as
finishing with generating
electricity
by turbine. To commence with, the first cold
water
was pumped down to the injection well 4.5
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
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long underground,
subsequently
, the cold
water
entered the geothermal zone (hot rocks) and moved to the production well and produced hot
water
. On the flip side,
finally
, hot
water
is produced by the geothermal zone, pumped up to the condenser
then
steam is produced.
Thus
, the turbine is powered by steam and starts spinning the next energy produced. In the final step, the generator is powered by turning the turbine
as well as
electricity
is manufactured. Eventually, the produced
electricity
is moved to the power network.
Submitted by amirghhhhhh1999 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "as well as".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, water with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "moved" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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