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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Teachers are not as importance as they used to be because of the choice of other alternatives for students such as, online teaching.To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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Since the pandemic covid-19, online classes have become commonplace. Some people argue that as there are a lot of alternatives for
teachers
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such
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 as online classrooms and AI tools,
therefore
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teachers
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 are not important for the learning process. In my opinion, I believe that physical classrooms are crucial for
students
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 to enhance social
behaviour
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 and boost confidence.
To begin
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 with, physical classrooms are significant for
students
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 to enhance societal understanding. The way with which a student confabulates with others can be improved by face-to-face interaction between teacher and student.
For example
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, research conducted by the newspaper "The Times of India" demonstrates that 80 per cent of children with bad manners learn social and appropriate
behaviour
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 when they are enrolled in not online classroom because an offline tutor can provide a better process of learning
along with
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 personality development. Meanwhile, in a virtual classroom, educators do not pay that much attention to
students
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' societal
behaviour
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 learning process, and student demeanour completely depends upon family and friends.
Thus
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,
it is clear that
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 offline
teachers
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 are more important than online tutors.
Secondly
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, physically available classes are crucial to boost the confidence of individuals. Physical interaction with other
students
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 and
teachers
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 not only gives rise to collaborative and cooperative
behaviour
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 but
also
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 fosters assurance levels in
students
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. A study conducted by Oxford University suggests that people who deal with others face-to-face rather than online mediums
such
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 as Google Meet, Zoom, WhatsApp and Facebook are found to be more confident than individuals who arrange virtual meetings.
On the other hand
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, in virtual interactions, people are less likely to find out the shortcomings and failings of their manners.
Therefore
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, it is conclusively clear that confidence levels can be improved by attending online classes. In conclusion,
while
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 nowadays a myriad of online mediums are present, we cannot inevitably deny the surplus necessity of offline interaction with learners and educators. Even with a lot of improvement and advancement in virtual systems, it will never surpass the physically available
teachers
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.

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task achievement
Consider improving the use of supporting examples by providing more detailed or varied examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly links back to the main topic to maintain focus and clarity.
introduction
The introduction effectively presents the topic and the personal viewpoint, setting a clear stance for the essay.
logical structure
Each paragraph addresses distinct aspects of the main argument, maintaining a logical flow throughout the essay.
conclusion
The conclusion succinctly reiterates the main argument and reinforces the importance of physical classrooms.
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