Studies have shown that in many countries the income gap be tween the rich and poor is ever increasing. What problems can arise from this situation and what could be done to address this situation?
These days, the negative happening is that the income space among the
people
who are rich and the poor has been climbing in some countries
. This
essay discusses to
the matters Change preposition
apply
that
is
a result of Change the verb form
are
this
issue and how we can solve it.
Unfortunately, when the rich people
bcome
richer and poor populations become Correct your spelling
become
more poor
in Replace the words
poorer
countries
; thereafter
, the rate of crime and number
of communities who do not have education grow.
On the one hand, the rate of Correct article usage
the number
commite
crimes Correct your spelling
committing
increase
and society Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
do
not have safety when they Change the verb form
does
are in
live in Verb problem
apply
countries
owing to the fact that the figure of poverty regions go
up. To illustrate, all Correct subject-verb agreement
goes
people
need some elements for living and when they are poor, they cannot provide them; in fact, they comit
Correct your spelling
commit
crime
like Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
boglary
, robbery and so on. Correct your spelling
burglary
On the other hand
, when the communities do not have money
for their food, they do not spend money
on their educations
. Fix the agreement mistake
education
In other words
, the number of people
who are able to improve countries
reduce
over Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
the
period of Correct article usage
a
times
.
Fix the agreement mistake
time
This
probelm
can be solved by changing Correct your spelling
problem
Correct article usage
the economy
economy
method. It is crucial that most Replace the word
economic
countries
which have this
matter do not have good industries and their economy
does not have rising
trend; Correct article usage
a rising
consequently
, I advice
these Replace the word
advise
countries
create
Fix the infinitive
to create
chance
in which other Add an article
a chance
countries
invest their money
for
building Change preposition
in
comapnies
and shops. Correct your spelling
companies
Furthermore
, they have to use sucsseful
Correct your spelling
successful
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
experience
Correct subject-verb agreement
experiences
for
Change preposition
to
chnage
their Correct your spelling
change
economy
that
Correct word choice
so that
this
gap decline
.
Correct subject-verb agreement
declines
To sum up
, In my opinion, the money
cap
between the rich and the poor has a negative effect on safety and Correct your spelling
gap
Correct article usage
the country
country
Change noun form
country's
developments
and it can Fix the agreement mistake
development
be solve
by Change the verb form
be solved
alter
the way of Change the verb form
altering
economy
.Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea that is relevant to the main topic. Try to use topic sentences more effectively to introduce the paragraph's main idea.
task achievement
Provide more detailed examples and explanations to support your main points, and ensure these examples are directly relevant to the argument you are making.
task achievement
Consider using a wider range of vocabulary to convey your ideas more precisely and avoid repetition.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which help frame the discussion effectively.
task achievement
You have identified two key problems resulting from the income gap, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The proposed solution in the essay shows a thoughtful approach to addressing the income gap issue in various countries.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.