Wild animals do not have enough space.Some people think that protection of wild animals from extinction is a waste of money because it is natural.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Many
species
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of wild
animals
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are on the verge of extinction
due to
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deforestation.There is an inconclusive debate as to whether we should protect those
animals
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.From my perspective,saving those provides humans with many benefits.
To begin
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with,Nowadays,The world has become an industrial era.Factories and many built-up areas have been accumulating.
Thus
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,Many green areas now are being replaced with new cities.
This
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makes wild
animals
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lose their habitats and some
species
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have to face extinction.The balance of nature has been destroyed along the way.The food chain has been interrupted.Some people might argue that humans are at the top of the chain so it will not affect us
however
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,
this
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will impact us eventually in a way we do not expect.
For instance
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,if our delicious meats
such
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as beef,pork and fish no longer have their prey,it would put those
species
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at risk.Some people think that
this
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problem
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can be easily solved by making artificial ones.
In contrast
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,the nutrients in those foods are not at the same level and cannot compare to the original one.
Moreover
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,since humans are the reason for
this
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problem
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we should take responsibility.
According to
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the positivity of natural balance,saving those
animals
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does not require a lot of money.If both the government and individuals consider
this
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as a
problem
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,it is an easy task to do.
For example
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,we could create wildlife sanctuaries and the zoo to preserve
the
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apply
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diversification. In conclusion,the diversification of
species
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of
animals
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is crucial to keeping nature in balance.
Additionally
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,saving those
animals
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is effortless.The benefits outweigh the drawbacks so it is our responsibility to solve the
problem
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that we have created.
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task achievement
While the essay presents a clear response to the prompt, adding more depth to each argument may help to present a more comprehensive perspective. Consider discussing more reasons for the protection of wild animals beyond just ethical responsibility and balance of nature.
coherence cohesion
Try to link your paragraphs more effectively. For instance, you could use linking words or phrases to guide the reader through your argument about why it is beneficial to humans to protect animals.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, both presenting the thesis that saving wild animals provides benefits to humans.
task achievement
The author uses relevant examples to support the argument, such as the impact on the food chain and the idea of creating wildlife sanctuaries.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is maintained, with a clear progression from industrial impact on wildlife to human responsibility.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Biodiversity
  • Ecosystem services
  • Habitat preservation
  • Extinction rates
  • Wildlife tourism
  • Conservation programs
  • Ethical responsibility
  • Natural processes
  • Ecological balance
  • Wildlife corridors
  • Protected areas
  • Sustainable income
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