Some people think that development of technology helps to reduce crime, while others think that it encourages crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In
this
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modern world,
technology
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helps
people
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in many ways. Some
people
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believe that
technology
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helps to mitigate
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
illicit affairs
while
Linking Words
others think that it encourages
crime
Use synonyms
. I will discuss both views and give my opinion in upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, why it
alleviate
Correct subject-verb agreement
alleviates
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illegal activities because
such
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as
the
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apply
show examples
security cameras outside
the
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apply
show examples
houses or shops
plays
Correct subject-verb agreement
play
show examples
major
Add an article
a major
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role
to help
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in helping
show examples
people
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from
Use synonyms
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
such
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as robbery,
murders
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murder
show examples
and many more. To justify,
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
Linking Words
latest
technology
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people
Use synonyms
can see
their
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the
show examples
outside view of their shops or their
residence
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residences
show examples
on phones as they have all the control
on
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over
show examples
their phones and if any activity
occur
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occurs
show examples
they can take immediate action.
For example
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, in my
neibhourhood
Correct your spelling
neighbourhood
there was a robbery going to
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
occured
Correct your spelling
occur
outside their shop and by
god
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god's
show examples
sake they saw those robbers
while
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sitting at home and they
call
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called
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the cops on
dot
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the dot
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. Apart from
it
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this
show examples
, why it encourages
people
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to
do
Verb problem
engage in
show examples
crime
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as the latest
crime
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via
technology
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is going
Verb problem
apply
show examples
in world is the cyber
crime
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. To illustrate,
people
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misuse
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social sites
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
hacked
Wrong verb form
hack
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the accounts of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals and
then
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ask for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money in return. They blackmail
people
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by
misuse
Change the verb form
misusing
show examples
their followers and photos and after that
people
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get stressed and commit
suicides
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suicide
show examples
. To exemplify,
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according to
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apply
show examples
a survey conducted by a company named
as
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apply
show examples
Telesolutions in 2023 revealed that cybercrime is increased by eighty
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
and even
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children are
also
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involved in it.
To sum up
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, why
technology
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reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
crime
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such
Linking Words
as by the help of security cameras
inviduals
Correct your spelling
individuals
can have a look
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
their properties
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
.
Besides
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this
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
encourages
people
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to misuse the
technology
Use synonyms
by doing cybercrime.
Submitted by yuvrajsinghsaggu200703 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider improving sentence clarity and coherence by linking ideas smoothly. For example, use transition words like 'moreover', 'furthermore', or 'however' between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Ensure that both sides of the argument are equally discussed with specific examples and explanations to support your points.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both views on technology's impact on crime, showing a balanced discussion.
relevant specific examples
The examples provided, such as the surveillance camera scenario and cybercrime statistics, effectively illustrate your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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