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Band 2.5

The best way to make the road transport of goods safer is to ask drivers to take a driving test each year. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#road #transport #goods #drivers #test #year
It is argued that
,
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apply
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 it is
sgnificant
Correct your spelling
significant
 to
requier
Correct your spelling
require
 people to take
driving
Add an article
a driving
show examples
test
 every year because that will help to protect the goods when it is
transprted
Correct your spelling
transported
. I totally agree with
this
 statement
due to
 many
reasones
Correct your spelling
reasons
.
One
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On
show examples
one
Correct article usage
the one
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 hand, the
road
Fix the agreement mistake
roads
show examples
 in all countries around the world have
change
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changed
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 constantly.
For example
, in my hometown the
road
change
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changed
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last
 month because the
road
 was
destory
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destroyed
 when the rain came and
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
try
Wrong verb form
tried
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 to search for another place to make a new
road
. So, when people take a driving
test
 they will know about the
knew
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new
show examples
 roads. On another hand,
Add an article
an individual
the individual
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individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 are facing some teruibeels and health problems and they
don't
Correct your spelling
won't
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be
Verb problem
pay
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 attention
for
Change preposition
to
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 that
however
 when they do a driving
test
 they will
make
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take
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 a medical
cheek
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check
show examples
 and they will know if they have problems
prevent
Wrong verb form
preventing
show examples
him
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 from driving. For
insent
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insert
instant
, older people may have
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 with their eyes or
bloode
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blood
bloody
prusser
Correct your spelling
presser
pressure
 and that will
make
Verb problem
cause
show examples
a serious problems
Correct the article-noun agreement
serious problems
a serious problem
show examples
 when they drive. In conclusion, to make the
road
 transport
og
Correct your spelling
of
 goods more safer we should follow all
road
 rules and do
driving
Correct article usage
a driving
show examples
test
 each year to ensure pace for all users and goods.
Submitted by Loody on

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coherence cohesion
The essay would benefit from a clearer and more structured progression of ideas. Consider organizing your points into clear paragraphs with topic sentences that guide the reader.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences contain spelling and grammatical errors which can obscure meaning. Focus on proofreading your work for a polished finish.
task achievement
While addressing the question, make sure to expand on your main points with more detailed examples and explanations to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear focus, and try to use more linking words to connect ideas smoothly from one to the other.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, creating a complete structure.
task achievement
The writer attempts to address both sides of the argument, which is good practice for critical discussion.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion is focused and reiterates the main points of the essay, providing a clear ending.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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