Some feel that tourism endangers culture while others feel it is beneficial. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

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There is an argument whether
tourism
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, as a major global
industry
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, is a productive or detrimental phenomenon for
culture
Use synonyms
.
This
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essay will argue that if an effective management approach is not adopted,
this
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could have bad effects on local traditions,
while
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it has numerous benefits. On the one hand, a mismanaged
tourism
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industry
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leads to destroying local communities’ lifestyles and
subsequently
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their
culture
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. Citizens of tourist destinations may become willing to change their local jobs or customs because of the influx of tourists because they are prone to make more money and have a more convenient life. Numerous Rasht native inhabitants,
for instance
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, who were traditionally farmer have sold their farmlands and adopted other types of jobs, and
this
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massive transition endangers their
culture
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too.
Therefore
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, it is crucial
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
regulatory agencies
set
Fix the infinitive
to set
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severe regulations to reduce
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
consequences as much as possible.
On the other hand
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, proponents of the
tourism
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industry
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believe that
this
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profitable phenomenon not only encourages local communities and authorities to preserve their cultural values but
also
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serves the funding needed for
this
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preservation. People and governments of regions with a great number of visitors, and witnessed tourists’ enthusiasm about their traditional lifestyle, may understand more about the high value of their traditions and make more effort to protect them.
Moreover
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, it is proven that
tourism
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is considerably profitable because when a significant number of visitors travel to a city they need food, accommodation, and many other facilities and it leads to economic prosperity.
Hence
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, governments can invest
this
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income in protecting local
culture
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and values. In conclusion,
tourism
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is a double-faced phenomenon that can be either harmful or useful. It depends on how a community would use the high potential of
this
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industry
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.
Submitted by elahepoorhosein1990 on

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task response
Try to include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Use diverse cases or more detailed insights to showcase your understanding effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure all points are connected with a clear logical progression to improve coherence and cohesion. Make certain ideas flow naturally into one another.
task response
The essay effectively presents both sides of the argument, fulfilling the task achievement requirement.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, signposting your main ideas effectively.
coherence cohesion
Good use of transition words to guide readers through the argument, helping to maintain coherence.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural erosion
  • cultural homogenization
  • cultural heritage
  • mutual understanding
  • cultural diversity
  • preservation
  • economic incentive
  • revival
  • authenticity
  • over-commercialized
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