Some feel that tourism endangers culture while others feel it is beneficial. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#feel #tourism #endangers #culture

There is an argument whether

tourism

, as a major global

industry

, is a productive or detrimental phenomenon for

culture

This

essay will argue that if an effective management approach is not adopted,

this

could have bad effects on local traditions,

while

it has numerous benefits. On the one hand, a mismanaged

tourism

industry

leads to destroying local communities’ lifestyles and

subsequently

their

culture

. Citizens of tourist destinations may become willing to change their local jobs or customs because of the influx of tourists because they are prone to make more money and have a more convenient life. Numerous Rasht native inhabitants,

for instance

, who were traditionally farmer have sold their farmlands and adopted other types of jobs, and

this

massive transition endangers their

culture

too.

Therefore

, it is crucial

Change preposition

for

show examples

regulatory agencies

set

Fix the infinitive

to set

show examples

severe regulations to reduce

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

consequences as much as possible.

On the other hand

, proponents of the

tourism

industry

believe that

this

profitable phenomenon not only encourages local communities and authorities to preserve their cultural values but

also

serves the funding needed for

this

preservation. People and governments of regions with a great number of visitors, and witnessed tourists’ enthusiasm about their traditional lifestyle, may understand more about the high value of their traditions and make more effort to protect them.

Moreover

, it is proven that

tourism

is considerably profitable because when a significant number of visitors travel to a city they need food, accommodation, and many other facilities and it leads to economic prosperity.

Hence

, governments can invest

this

income in protecting local

culture

and values. In conclusion,

tourism

is a double-faced phenomenon that can be either harmful or useful. It depends on how a community would use the high potential of

this

industry

Submitted by elahepoorhosein1990 on Tue Nov 05 2024

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task response

Try to include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Use diverse cases or more detailed insights to showcase your understanding effectively.

coherence cohesion

Ensure all points are connected with a clear logical progression to improve coherence and cohesion. Make certain ideas flow naturally into one another.

task response

The essay effectively presents both sides of the argument, fulfilling the task achievement requirement.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, signposting your main ideas effectively.

coherence cohesion

Good use of transition words to guide readers through the argument, helping to maintain coherence.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural erosion
cultural homogenization
cultural heritage
mutual understanding
cultural diversity
preservation
economic incentive
revival
authenticity
over-commercialized

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Some feel that tourism endangers culture while others feel it is beneficial. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugat, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

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As technology helps to gain access to information, fact teaching should be removed and school should focus on developing skills and talents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Others think they should begin after 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.