Although you have never formally studied computing, you have always been interested in computers. You have just read about a computer course that really interests you, but it is only for people who have completed an elementary course. Write a letter to the college enrolment officer. In your letter explain why you are writing describe your circumstances ask if a special exception can be made for you so you can enrol in the course You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear

#computers #computer #course #interests #people #college #enrolment #officer #circumstances #exception #enrol #addresses

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Dear officer, I

was

Verb problem

saw

show examples

seen

computer

course

. I want to attend

course

Add an article

the course

a course

show examples

but I do not have completed an elementary

course

I am only interested in computers. When I was a child I

am go

Wrong verb form

went

show examples

computer

Correct article usage

a computer

show examples

cafe and I

was playing

Wrong verb form

played

show examples

with the

computer

for a long time. I did not notice what the evening was like. I am so

intersted

Correct your spelling

interested

and my

teacher

noticed

this

situation and my

teacher

talked to my family. My family was not

intersted

Correct your spelling

interested

this

issue. My family wanted me to be a

teacher

and became a

teacher

however

I am

Rephrase

very

show examples

intersted

Correct your spelling

interested

Change preposition

in computer

show examples

computer

Fix the agreement mistake

computers

show examples

and I still want to study in the

computer

field. I will be very happy if you grant me

Correct article usage

the

show examples

privilege and I can

attendet

Correct your spelling

attend

attended

course

. I really want to attend a

course

. I do not have a basic education certificate, but I have an

advenced

Correct your spelling

advanced

computer

skill I would be very happy if you would evaluate it. I hope you can help me. Kind regards.

Submitted by kubrairmak287 on Tue Nov 05 2024

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suitable writing tone

Try to use more formal and precise language, as this is an official letter to a college enrolment officer. This will enhance the overall tone of the letter, matching your intended audience and purpose.

logical structure

Ensure there is a logical structure by organizing your ideas. Each paragraph should have a single, clear focus to help your main points stand out more clearly.

complete response

You have clearly expressed your interest in the course and your background with computers, which helps in making a complete response.

greeting and closing

The closing of the letter, 'Kind regards,' is polite and appropriate, fitting the tone of a formal letter.

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

168 words

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