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Band 6.5

Many cannot speak or present well in public. Some people think that it is important to speak well in public, so the training should be from school. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #school
Recently, a major proportion of people have no public speech ability. Many individuals claim that it is crucial to present significantly in public, so it should be learned from the school. I mostly agree with
this
 point of view. Admittedly, public speaking is important in the young's personal growth,
while
 training it in schools is not suitable for everyone. Because not all pupils present frequently in public in their
further
 career path, it is more beneficial to allocate the time to other skills which are useful in their future lives.
For example
, IT-objected students do not need to public speaking, since they have certain tasks in order to complete.
Additionally
, public speaking might lead to some detrimental effects on youngster's mental health in terms of anxiety. As an
example
Add a comma
example,
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 students who have some fear of the stage, are afraid of public speech which leads to
being
Verb problem
apply
show examples
frustrated
Replace the word
frustration
show examples
.
Hence
, it impacts negatively pupils' psychology.
Nevertheless
, public speaking education at school has more benefits,
such
 as improving interpersonal skills, and self-esteem.
In other words
, it is an integral part of communication, and developing it might lead to an explanation of better oneself.
For example
, there is a debate club which arranges the event in order to improve the public speech in each education institution.
Therefore
, the children learn how to speak in front of an audience, which enhances their justification and
provement
Correct your spelling
improvement
 abilities in any context.
In addition
, it contributes significantly to maintaining the confidence of the individuals.
This
 means that they express themselves better in appropriate circumstances, including interviews, conferences and public forums. In conclusion,
while
 it might not advisable for certain people, I am of the opinion that it is the basis of the student's development.
Submitted by ilkin.abdullaev04 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure smoother transitions between contrasting ideas. Using cohesive devices or phrases can enhance the logical flow of the essay.
task achievement
Provide a more balanced analysis of both viewpoints to fully satisfy the task requirements. Even though primarily supporting one side, addressing counterarguments adequately strengthens the overall response.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly defined, effectively framing the essay.
task achievement
Specific examples, such as references to IT-focused students and mental health, enrich the essay with relevant context and depth.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task prompt effectively, with a clear stance and justification.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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