Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

There is a variety of reasons showcasing why a rising volume of individuals striving forward the idea of getting substituted treatments and cures, rather than receiving
health
care from hospitals or clinics these days. I, myself, would stand firm in the viewpoint that the negative aspects slightly exceed the advantages. To be much clearer, the upcoming paragraphs will help me to reason well with my way of thinking and the causes.
On the other hand
, numerous benefits result from home-curing initiated by daunting scenarios of waiting and
congesting
Replace the word
congestion
show examples
among many patients in the waiting hall, or it might be originated from the swift and intense pace of life, where the majority of individuals are driven to craziness with their daily grind.
Thus
, with some mild
health
issues, which could be easily tackled, the suitable approach to be taken is independently solving it. Thanks to the significant availability of diverse scientific information regarding
health
matters approved by official doctors and researchers, it has been more convenient and flexible for patients to continue their lives without being interrupted.
On the other hand
, the phenomenon might somehow create a huge sense of uncertainty and confusion, leading to more anxiety or stress, especially for people who are not fully conscious to recognize errors or oddness from, could be, home-based healing articles or pieces of insights. Basically speaking, there are tremendous amounts of disapproved information which, at the same time as approved ones, are shuffled throughout the Internet.
Therefore
, it is fairly difficult for some to detect whether they are stumbling upon the correct methods or not.
This
, in fact, has made people suffer from severe unfortunate consequences like worsening the conditions,
hence
, resulting in difficulties in re-healing the body, tensing up, or even possibly leading to some fatal scenarios. In brief, patients ought to seek from both credible sources and figures. To summarize the aforementioned ideas, both pros and cons are posed in
this
new-generation practice, and at times, the drawbacks even take over the benefits with regard to the influence. What’s more, to find a better way to end your
health
problems, it depends on your state of
health
, the situation, and other side factors, yet, always bear in mind to be aware enough when facing information input.
Submitted by jakelong16091994 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples
Try to include more specific examples to support your points and to illustrate your arguments more concretely.
clear comprehensive ideas
Make sure to clarify your main arguments more thoroughly and ensure that each paragraph clearly uncovers a unique idea.
logical structure
The essay presents a logical and well-structured argument, with a clear introduction and conclusion.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction effectively sets the tone and context for the essay, and the conclusion summarizes the key points well.
complete response
The essay generally stays on topic and addresses the task comprehensively, exploring the potential positive and negative aspects of the issue.
supported main points
Cohesion between paragraphs is maintained with smooth transitions, making it easy to follow the writer's train of thought.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: