IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The best way to make the road transport of goods safer is to ask drivers to take a driving test each year. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#road #transport #goods #drivers #test #year
Delivery in the present is getting more popular. So there are laws or rules for
drivers
 to reduce accidents.
Besides
, some people think that
drivers
 should be tested
driving
Change preposition
for driving
show examples
 each year to be safe for the public. In my opinion, I strongly agree with
this
 topic and my reason will
present
Wrong verb form
be presented
show examples
 in
this
 essay. Since
covid-19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
show examples
 disease spread, people use a lot of transport because people must quarantine at home. Many
drivers
 need to work in a race with time to keep delivery on time. It makes some
drivers
 drive faster than the law determines and drive through traffic lights which may result in an accident.
This
 testing of the
drivers
 will help ensure that they follow traffic rules.
In addition
, a physical
test
 of
drivers
 is critical in order not to cause harm to the driver.
For Example
, an eye
test
 that can identify a traffic light correctly and an ear
test
 that can hear the sound of a car honking.
On the other hand
, the cost of
test
 driving is rather expensive. It makes some
drivers
 digress that will have been tested each year.
Moreover
, it is difficult to book because everyone needs to take the exam.
Whereas
, the government ought to maintain and improve the roads all the time
such
 as filling the cracks of the
road
, adjusting the
road
 from gravel to concrete and  Drawing a line of the roads to
drivers
 can be seen obviously.
This
 will help
drivers
 get safe
while
 driving. In summary, it can be seen that
test
 driving each year will help
drivers
 to be aware of safe driving on the
road
.
Although
 the exam
has cost
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 expensive
also
 the government ought to maintain the
road
 for everyone. But I think that testing the driver is the best way.
Submitted by theejuta.b on

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task achievement
Focus on ensuring that your main points are well-supported with examples and justifications. For instance, while you mention the importance of testing drivers' physical conditions, further elaboration or examples could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to improve the logical progression of your ideas. Some sentences seem to jump from one idea to another without clear transitions. Use linking words to create a more organized flow.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly sets up your position on the topic. It's concise and provides a good overview of your argument.
task achievement
You address both sides of the argument by acknowledging the potential disadvantages of annual testing and offering alternative solutions.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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