IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

You have just read an article in an international travel magazine which contained some information about your town that is incorrect. Write a letter to the editor of the magazine. In your letter. -Correct the information in the article -Explain why it is important for the magazine to give correct information -Suggest what the magazine should do about this situation

#article #travel #magazine #information #town #editor #-correct #-explain #-suggest #situation
Dear sir, I am writing
this
 letter to inform you that a mistake that you made in a recent magazine about a person An international travel magazine which delivers each Saturday with informative news and ideas. And it is the favourite of many people because it gives the bio of some famous people.
Similarly
,
this
 Saturday you write an article on Kalpna Chawla, Astronaut.
This
 article explains her life and struggles. But, in the middle, time in space is incorrect which is 31d 14h 54m, you mentioned 31d 21h 45m. You know
this
 is the only article which provides accurate information to readers.
Also
, for new readers, it is important to know about the life of Kalpna Chalwa because she is proud of our country and she was the first Astronaut who went into space. I hope you will correct the mistake as soon as possible. Yours sincerely, Rohit
Submitted by harmandeep51075 on

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task achievement
The letter successfully addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear correction to the article, explaining the importance of accuracy, and suggesting an action for correction. Try to expand more on the suggestion to add more depth to the task response.
coherence cohesion
The letter is clear and understandable, with a logical structure, but some sentences could be rephrased for smoother transitions between ideas. Try to link paragraphs with more transition words or phrases.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to enhance clarity and flow.
coherence cohesion
The letter opens and closes with appropriate and polite greetings, adhering to the formal letter format.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is respectful and suitable for a formal letter to a magazine editor.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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