Writing Task 2 You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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In other countries, students attend universities in other cities, but few still live at home with their
families
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while
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studying. I believe
this
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is because they cannot live independently yet and study very well
while
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living with their
families
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, with
this
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living home outweighs the disadvantage. There are college students who still want to live with their
families
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because they feel the comfort. Aside from that, they do not have to think of any more other burdens like noisy roommates and preparing their food and they have all the access when it comes to internet connectivity,
as well as
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she does not need t. Just like my neighbour’s, every time she goes to her room her roommate
are
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is
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bringing someone and it annoys her since they create loud noise in the room, which affects her studies, especially during exams.
To sum up
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,
although
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they may find it quite unusual in the beginning, through the years they may find it important.
Hence
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, sometimes
this
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will provide a great advantage to an individual, to prepare themselves for the future once they become a professional. Students will learn to develop their maturity in dealing with different kinds of situations they may encounter.
For example
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, sharing things in the laundry, and taking turns will develop their patience and
also
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it will help them increase their network, it will help them develop their interpersonal skills and social well-being. In conclusion, an individual from the beginning may find it challenging to be independent because of their whole life they have been with their
families
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but soon they will learn the importance of it. With the guidance of their parents, everything will go well. Let us just give them the benefit of the doubt that soon they will learn the right way that will help them in the future.
Submitted by lauravictor.nz on

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task achievement
Try to provide clearer and more comprehensive ideas throughout the essay, ensuring each paragraph fully connects back to your main argument.
task achievement
Using more specific examples can help bolster your arguments and illustrate your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by ensuring transitions between each paragraph are clear and each point flows logically to the next.
coherence cohesion
You have included an introduction and conclusion, which frame your essay well.
task achievement
You offer some personal examples, which can make your arguments more relatable.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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