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Writing Samples
Band 7

Social networks are one of the best platforms nowadays to share information; although some individuals think that permission should be given to publish personal information of citizens, rest people oppose it. As exposing private data can be dangerous, so I believe that it should not be allowed to spread personal statistics.

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A significant number of citizens prefer to read
news
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 online rather than printed newspapers
due to
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 the advancement of social media platforms. There are both benefits and drawbacks to reading
news
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 online,
however
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, the advantages outweigh the downsides. On the one hand, the number of e-readers in
case
Correct article usage
the case
show examples
 of newspapers is increasing dramatically in
this
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 contemporary society
due to
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 the improvement of social media like Facebook,
Tiktok
Correct your spelling
TikTok
show examples
, X, and Instagram.
Firstly
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, reading soft copies is convenient and cheaper than previous hard copies as they do not need to buy paper.
Secondly
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, It can be read from any part of the world
as well as
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 they have the chance to get old
news
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 from the archive.
Moreover
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,
this
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 process is environmentally friendly as they do not require any raw materials (trees) to print
this
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news
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.
For instance
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,
according to
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 the investigation by BBC Bangla, Bangladeshi newspaper companies require more than 1 million tons of paper to cover their
news
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 in a year, which has a significant negative impact on our forests.
On the other hand
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, sometimes we see that it is common for online newspapers to publish some fake
news
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 to catch people's attention which is not possible in printed versions.
Besides
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, advertisements kill time
while
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 reading on an online platform.
In addition
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, blue rays come during the reading which is too deleterious to our eye.
For example
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, a research paper was published by the University of Dhaka, they explained that more than 78 % of eye problems were
due to
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 the radiation coming from digital devices like mobiles, and laptops. In conclusion, reading
news
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 on online websites enables people to get
news
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 promptly at a cheap price, which would take at least one day .
Although
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, there are some disadvantages like health problems the facilities outweigh the downsides.

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples and data to further strengthen your arguments about the benefits and drawbacks of online news consumption.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs, which will enhance the flow of your essay.
introduction conclusion present
The essay provides a clear introduction, outlining the trend of online news reading and presenting a solid thesis statement.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the key points discussed and reiterates the main argument, providing closure to the essay.
logical structure
Your essay offers well-structured arguments for both the benefits and drawbacks of online news consumption.
complete response
You have clearly identified the main reasons why people prefer online news, providing a balanced view of its advantages and disadvantages.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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