Some people think that the best way to be successful in life is to get a university education. Others disagree and say this is no longer true. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the contemporary world,
ceratain
Correct your spelling
certain
groups of
people
are of the opinion that
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
university degree is required to get a successful career
while
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
believe that it is an old practice. Personally, I believe that former
education
plays a critical role, In
this
essay I will discuss both views and support my
opinon
Correct your spelling
opinion
. On the one hand.Many youngsters do not like to continue their
education
because of the following reasons.
Firsty
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Firstly
First
,
couple
Correct article usage
a couple
show examples
of individuals drop out
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
their colleges or schools, to give
helping
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a helping
show examples
hand to their
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
.
For example
, sometimes
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
families are going through
a bad times
Correct the article-noun agreement
bad times
a bad time
show examples
and
juenile
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juvenile
takes responsibility
to support
Change preposition
for supporting
show examples
their family financially and
moraly
Correct your spelling
morally
. They have to
made
Change the verb
make
show examples
a few
secrifices
Correct your spelling
sacrifices
like
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
to make
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
work out for them.
Secondly
, some
people
are blessed and
privilaged
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privileged
, they have to
dropout
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drop out
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
their
education
to learn
the
Change preposition
about the
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family business. These
people
generally have a financially satisfied
lifes
Correct your spelling
life
lives
but not mentally happy.
On the other hand
, I have widely witnessed that individuals who
goes
Change the verb form
go
show examples
to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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university
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
relatively mature and sensible.
For example
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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university students come across millions of
people
from all around the world from everyone they learn unique quality and life skills.
Moreover
, after gaining
professional
Add an article
a professional
show examples
degree, they can make their dream come true.
Additionally
,
people
will feel incredible for leaving
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their work . Those couple of years spent
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
educations
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education
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had
a
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apply
show examples
wonderful memories which will
stays
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stay
show examples
with us forever.
To conclude
, there are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
benefits of leaving their
education
and
support
Wrong verb form
supporting
show examples
family and their businesses.
However
, In my opinion, time
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
on
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
and working on their goals have more
privilages
Correct your spelling
privileges
.
Submitted by lovjotsandhu1 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Work on organizing your ideas more clearly. Each paragraph should focus on one main point only.
Task Achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points and analyze them accordingly.
Task Achievement
Ensure clarity and coherence in your expressions to improve the overall comprehensiveness of your ideas.
Task Achievement
You included both perspectives on the issue, which fulfills the basic requirement of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has an introduction and a conclusion, which frame your discussion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • university degree
  • specialized knowledge
  • critical thinking skills
  • networking opportunities
  • vocational training
  • self-made entrepreneurs
  • gig economy
  • online courses
  • certifications
  • formal education
  • practical experience
  • lifelong learning
  • career goals
  • individual circumstances
  • academic qualifications
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