Many people spend a lot of money on clothes, hair cut and beauty product to enhance their appearence. some people think that it is a good way to spend money, while other that there is a better way to spend it. discuss both views and give yor opinion.

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Nowadays, physical

appearence

Correct your spelling

appearance

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

is the

firts

Correct your spelling

first

and foremost thing which

individual

Correct article usage

an individual

show examples

notices. So, people invest a lot

Change preposition

show examples

buying different attires, beauty products and haircuts to look more attractive and appealing.

while

Linking Words

few of them

beleive

Correct your spelling

believe

this

Linking Words

fund could be invested somewhere else like in

eduaction

Correct your spelling

education

to secure their future.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss my unbiased opinion

along with

Linking Words

former

Add an article

the former

show examples

and latter

view

Fix the agreement mistake

views

show examples

. Spending

money

Use synonyms

on clothes and beauty products is a great choice

beacuse

Correct your spelling

because

boost

Correct subject-verb agreement

boosts

show examples

morale

Add an article

the morale

show examples

of individuals. If someone is carrying themselves

Correct your spelling

show examples

an attractive way it will build confidence among them.

For instance

Linking Words

, at office presentations

Add a comma

show examples

if an employee is dressed well, they will look more presentable and confident.

Additionally

Linking Words

, some people want to look rich and want to present their lavish lifestyle

show

Fix the infinitive

to show

show examples

their status and class in front of

socitey

Correct your spelling

society

On the other hand

Linking Words

instead

Linking Words

of investing

money

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

thses

Correct your spelling

these

products

Add a comma

products,

show examples

one should spend it on other useful things for

their

Change the word

show examples

fruitful future.

Firstly

Linking Words

, spending on education is

Change the article

the

show examples

best option because it will be helpful in gaining knowledge

as well as

Linking Words

enhancing skills by which one can develop

their

Change the word

show examples

bright future.

Moreover

Linking Words

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

can invest

little

Correct word choice

a small

show examples

amount of

money

Use synonyms

to earn more. To

examplyfy

Correct your spelling

explain

Change preposition

apply

show examples

running small businesses like

nails

Change the noun form

nail

show examples

saloon

Correct your spelling

salons

show examples

and working as

Change the article

show examples

makeup artist can help in earning more which could be

benificial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

and help one to manage their expenses.

To conclude

Linking Words

, in my

opinion

Add the comma(s)

opinion,

show examples

both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

views have equal significance. As it is common saying that,

first

Change the article

the first

show examples

impression is the

last

Linking Words

impression. So, presenting yourself

Correct your spelling

show examples

an attractive way is important.

However

Linking Words

, people should invest

money

Use synonyms

wisely.

navdeepbajaj89Tue Nov 12 2024

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grammar

Avoid spelling and grammatical errors such as 'firts', 'beleive', and 'examplyfy'. These can distract from the clarity of your ideas.

writing style

Ensure each paragraph has a clear and focused topic sentence to enhance coherence.

task response

Provide more detailed examples and explanations to fully support your points and enhance task achievement.

writing style

Work on sentence variety to make your writing more engaging.

content

The essay offers a balanced discussion of both viewpoints, which is essential for task achievement.

structure

The introduction and conclusion are present and effectively frame the discussion.

coherence

The essay maintains a clear focus on the topic throughout, helping to maintain coherence.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

268 words

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Many people spend a lot of money on clothes, hair cut and beauty product to enhance their appearence. some people think that it is a good way to spend money, while other that there is a better way to spend it. discuss both views and give yor opinion.

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Too much emphasis is placed on going university for academic study. People should be encouraged to do vocational training, because there is a lack of qualified tradespeople such as electricians or plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You want to sell some of your furniture. You think a friend of yours might like to buy it from you. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter -explain why you are selling -describe the furniture -suggest a date when your friend can come and see the furniture

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe that they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?