Should governments spend more money on space exploration? Write a one-sided opinion essay to answer this question giving reasons and examples to support your opinion.
Investing more
money
in space
exploration has become crucial for the
Correct article usage
apply
governments
. However
, this
case is costing the authorities a huge amount of money
, and work. In my opinion, governments
should not allocate funds on
Change preposition
to
space
because the greatest need is in education
and exploring the empty landscapes on the earth
.
To begin
with, governments
should boost the investments in the education
infrastructures for the poor countries. For example
, in the third world countries
there is a shortage in high quality of Add a comma
countries,
education
, notably in the foundation years. Furthermore
, schooling is critical for the economy, good education
offers the capable
of Replace the word
capability
workforce
. In brief, Add an article
the workforce
education
is the foundation of our lives, government should increase the focus on it, instead
of spending money
on space
.
In addition
, there are a lot of empty landscapes on the earth
without humans, the governments
should discover how could people live on them. For instance
, Recent research from (PSU) has shown that 30%-40% of the earth
is empty. However
, the research argued that we can raise the population of our planet
to 17 billion by benefits
from empty lands. Wrong verb form
benefiting
Moreover
, earth
is easier than space
and costs the lowest
Correct word choice
least
money
. In short, there are other solutions on the earth
more beneficial than space
we should use it.
In conclusion, I believe that authorities must not spend more money
on exploring space
because schooling is more valuable, and we have another easy solution on our planet
. Losing money
, wasting materials and the need for education
. If we want to explore another planet
we have to discover our planet
at
first.Change preposition
apply
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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear focus and sticks to the question, but try to include more specific examples and details to fully develop your points. This will strengthen your argument and increase relevance.
coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing logical connections between paragraphs and points. Each paragraph should seamlessly follow the previous one, ensuring the flow of the essay is maintained throughout.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present, summarizing your position effectively.
task achievement
The essay maintains a one-sided stance, making it easy for the reader to understand your viewpoint.
task achievement
You provide clear reasoning as to why education and utilizing Earth's resources should take priority over space exploration.