IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Global warming is one of the biggest threats humans face in the 21st Century, and sea levels continue to rise at alarming rates. What problems are associated with this, and what are some possible solutions? 35

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Climate change and the rise of ocean levels are one of the prime obstacles humankind faces in
this
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 century.
This
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 essay will first suggest that the principal problems caused by
this
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 phenomenon are flooding and economic losses and
then
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 suggest that a better alarming system and
pollution
Use synonyms
 reduction are the most viable solutions. The major problems caused by global warming and the rise of sea levels are risks of flooding and economic degradation. There are countries around the globe, where it is almost impossible to prevent or avoid
such
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 disasters
due to
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 their geographic location.
As a result
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, economic losses, future stagnation and degradation are, unfortunately, inevitable. The principal example of
this
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 would be multiple major floodings that occurred in Cuba in 2010, which led to dramatic economic losses and stagnation. The most viable and appropriate solutions to these problems would be better alarming systems and
pollution
Use synonyms
 reduction, namely plastic
pollution
Use synonyms
. It is no secret that bad alarming methods were often the main cause of so many deaths,
thus
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 it is essential to provide endangered areas with smoothly-working alarming systems.
Furthermore
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, reducing plastic
pollution
Use synonyms
 would be a great help to prevent future global warming.
For instance
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, British scientists have recently proved in their studies that by
reduction
Replace the word
reducing
show examples
 plastic
pollution
Use synonyms
 in the ocean, we would stop global warming by 50%.
To sum up
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, climate change, namely global warming and the rise of the ocean is a big issue nowadays.
However
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, by implementing particular solutions, we have great chances to protect our planet and people in general.

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task response
Ensure the ideas are elaborated with enough depth to convey a strong argument or solution.
task response
Consider providing more specific examples or statistics to strengthen the argument about flooding and economic losses.
coherence cohesion
Improve the transition between paragraphs for smoother flow.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the supporting points align well with the main idea across the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay starts with a clear introduction that outlines the problems and solutions.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points covered in the essay.
task achievement
Provides specific example about flooding in Cuba which helps in task completion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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