Question: children are Facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social, and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of this pressure and what measures should be taken to reduce this pressure?
The modern
education
system has become a high-pressure
environment, exerting immense stress on students
from academic, social, and commercial perspectives. This
phenomenon has significant implications for students
' mental and emotional well-being, ultimately affecting their overall
quality of life.
The primary causes of this
pressure
are the increasingly competitive nature of education
and the emphasis on standardized testing. For instance
, in India, students
face immense pressure
to perform well in the Joint Entrance Examination (JEE) for admission to prestigious institutions like the Indian Institutes of Technology (IITs). The fierce competition for limited seats leads to an overwhelming focus on exam preparation, compromising students
' creative and extracurricular pursuits. Furthermore
, social media platforms perpetuate unrealistic expectations and promote consumerism, fueling the desire for material success. Commercialization of education
also
contributes to this
pressure
, as institutions prioritize profit over student
welfare.
To mitigate this
pressure
, educators and policymakers must implement measures to promote a holistic learning environment. Schools can adopt flexible assessment methods, focusing on individual progress rather than standardized scores. Incorporating mindfulness, physical education
, and creative activities into curricula can help students
manage stress. Additionally
, institutions should prioritize student
well-being over profit, ensuring adequate resources and support services. For example
, the Atal Tinkering Labs initiative in Indian schools encourages innovation, creativity, and hands-on learning, reducing emphasis on rote memorization. Moreover
, initiatives like the Central Board of Secondary Education
's (CBSE) "Happiness Curriculum" aim to cultivate emotional intelligence and well-being.
In conclusion, the pressing issue of student
pressure
can be effectively addressed by recognizing the detrimental effects of competitive testing and commercialization,
and implementing holistic Remove the comma
apply
education
reforms that prioritize student
well-being, individual growth, and creative development.Submitted by drnivyamohan1992 on
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task achievement
Make sure to clearly differentiate between academic, social, and commercial pressures in different sections.
task achievement
Try to add more examples or case studies to support your points, possibly from various countries for a broader perspective.
coherence cohesion
Link the causes and the solutions more directly to make the transitions between paragraphs smoother.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly outlines the issue at hand, setting a focused context for the rest of the essay.
complete response
The essay tackles the task effectively by suggesting both causes and solutions.
relevant specific examples
Provides specific examples, particularly from the Indian education system, to support points.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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