IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many people believe that social networking sites have had a huge negative atibe impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree.

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Social networking
sites
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 have become an integral part of modern
society
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, influencing how
people
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 communicate and interact. Some argue that these
platforms
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 have had a profoundly negative impact on both
individuals
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 and
society
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 as a whole.
While
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 I acknowledge that social
media
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 has introduced certain drawbacks, I believe the positive effects far outweigh the negative ones. On one hand, there are undeniable adverse effects associated with social networking
sites
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, particularly on
individuals
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' mental and emotional well-being. Excessive use of
platforms
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 like Instagram and Facebook often leads to social comparison, which can foster feelings of inadequacy, anxiety, and even depression.
For instance
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,
people
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 are frequently exposed to idealized representations of others' lives, making them dissatisfied with their own circumstances.
Furthermore
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, social
media
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 addiction can reduce productivity and impair face-to-face communication skills. In
this
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 sense, the impact on
individuals
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' mental health is a significant concern.
On the other hand
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, the benefits that social networking
sites
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 bring to both
individuals
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 and
society
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 cannot be overlooked. These
platforms
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 have revolutionized the way
people
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 communicate, making it easier to maintain relationships across long distances.
For example
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, families separated by continents can stay connected effortlessly through video calls and instant messaging,
thus
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 strengthening familial ties.
Moreover
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, social
media
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 has democratized information dissemination and provided a platform for marginalized voices, enabling social movements like #MeToo and climate change activism to gain global traction. These instances illustrate the potential of social networking
sites
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 to facilitate societal progress and awareness. In conclusion,
although
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 social networking
sites
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 can have detrimental effects on mental health and personal relationships when misused, they have undoubtedly brought about transformative benefits to
society
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. Their role in connecting
people
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, driving social change, and supporting professional and educational growth highlights their indispensable value.
Thus
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, I believe that the positive impact of social
media
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 on
society
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 far outweighs the negative consequences, provided
individuals
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 use these
platforms
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 responsibly.

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task achievement
Ensure to maintain a focused approach throughout, addressing every aspect of the task thoroughly.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance transitions between paragraphs for even smoother flow.
task achievement
Your essay exhibits a comprehensive understanding of the topic and presents a balanced view while clearly stating your position.
task achievement
Each paragraph supports the central argument effectively, with examples that are relevant and well explained.
coherence and cohesion
Logical flow is maintained throughout the essay, and all main points are consistently supported with examples.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion neatly frame your argument, reinforcing the central ideas presented.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • mental health
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • loneliness
  • face-to-face interaction
  • interpersonal skills
  • misinformation
  • public opinion
  • addiction
  • productivity
  • cyberbullying
  • emotional distress
  • privacy concerns
  • identity theft
  • data mining
  • networking opportunities
  • raising awareness
  • social issues
  • curated images
  • real-life social interaction
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