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Band 7

Online shopping is replacing conventional shopping stores. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#stores #development
The preponderance of people are choosing virtual markets because using the Internet has become more useful.Despite numerous disadvantages of online shopping,
such
 as damage to
products
 and availability, I believe that there are more advantages in the form of convenience and informed choice. Convenience is the greatest benefit of virtual shopping. These give customers the chance to avoid the hassle of going to a physical store and save time; they are able to order
products
 within minutes or even in seconds.
Moreover
, online shopping like „UZUM” is especially useful for people with accessibility Issues. Another huge benefit of e-shopping is informed choice which gives shoppers the opportunity to know the important pieces of information about a product or service before offering. Online stores usually are attached with pictures and descriptions by vendors.
Moreover
, most online stores have an additional section or comments and reviews from people who have experienced and used the product.
This
 helps prospective customers to know about that.
On the other hand
,
products
 bought in online shops may be damaged or destroyed in the course of shipping or transportation to the shopper as it may be
due to
 delay in the delivery accident or negligence of the logistic company. In other cases, the
products
 bought an online stores may be in transit or delivered to the wrong address.
Besides
 having the ability to try an item, When a customer has something in hand acknowledges that can buy the product. That isn’t always true when shopping online.There is an uncommon dealing with items,which are disordered
along with
 no longer available when attempting to make purchases. In conclusion, I believe that
overall
 online shopping has advanced enormously
due to
 convenience and informed choice, despite some potentially negative sides of it,
such
 as damage to
products
 and availability.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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task achievement
Clarify ideas further to enhance clarity and depth.
task achievement
Avoid vague phrases, such as "more advantages in the form of convenience and informed choice," as specificity aids understanding.
coherence cohesion
For coherence, use more varied transitional phrases to improve the logical flow of your paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The essay is generally well-structured, with clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
Discusses both advantages and disadvantages with a clear viewpoint.
task achievement
Utilizes examples such as "UZUM" and customer reviews, adding depth to the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • online shopping
  • shopping in stores
  • convenience
  • accessibility
  • wide variety
  • comparative pricing
  • crowds
  • queues
  • price comparison
  • returning and exchanging items
  • local businesses
  • personal interaction
  • sensory experience
What to do next:
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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