Some feel that tourism endangers culture while others think it is beneficial. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

Nowadays,
people
all over the world are more or less familiar with the
tourism
industry and
also
have different attitudes towards it. Some
people
argue that
culture
may be damaged by
tourism
while
others believe that it can have more advantages. I will discuss these views before presenting my own. On the one hand, some
people
justifiably believe that
tourism
has positive effects on
culture
due to
enriching it. When tourists visit or have a conversation with local
people
they have
this
opportunity to exchange their traditions, their history, and
also
learn from each other.
As a result
of
this
connection,
people
can pick up a good knowledge of tourist
culture
and use it to improve their
culture
.
Furthermore
, local
people
who are tourist hosts
also
have
this
opportunity to learn the tourists’ language and develop their overseas trade because language literacy is essential in the trade market.
On the other hand
, other groups of
people
claim that the
culture
may absorb the adverse effects of
tourism
. Unfortunately, there are some visitors that undercover of
tourism
try to harm the local
people
or operate terrorist attacks.
This
heinous activity is a global concern today and
people
are afraid and they try to avoid visiting tourists. These
people
also
may insist that travel should be banned by the governments.
However
, I do not find
this
argument convincing as state measures can enhance
this
field and prevent
such
activities by adding search gates in their boundaries and airports. In conclusion, in my view, the former opinion outweighs the latter one because
tourism
can enhance the
culture
by developing good new things
as well as
new language learning.
Also
, governments can advance their capability to create safe feelings among their
people
.
Submitted by mohsenakhlaghiplc on

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task achievement
You have addressed the task well, but could improve by providing more specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph is developed equally, with coherent progression from one idea to the next.
task achievement
You present a balanced view of both sides of the argument with a clear standpoint in the conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural erosion
  • cultural homogenization
  • cultural heritage
  • mutual understanding
  • cultural diversity
  • preservation
  • economic incentive
  • revival
  • authenticity
  • over-commercialized
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