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A rise in the use of mobile phones in the classroom by school children is severely impacting their concentration in class and overall education development. What are the causes of the problem and what can be done to solve it ?

#rise #phones #classroom #school #children #concentration #class #education #development
Nowadays, each student has his own mobile
phone
. Some are claiming that
carring
Correct your spelling
carrying
caring
 their mobile
phone
 to
school
 would influence their focus. In my opinion, the main reason for
this
 issue is attaching games that are downloading to their device.
This
 problem could be solved by collaboration between schools and
parents
 to overcome
this
 dilemma. One of the first causes of accompanying a mobile
phone
 to
school
 is playing video games. It can be a major cause of driving
phones
 to
school
 which are taking child’s attention all the time. Another cause that needs to be considered is some
parents
 want to be in contact with their kids, so they will encourage them to leave home with
phones
.
For example
, some families who are located in conflicting areas tend to send their children to
school
 with their
phones
 because
this
 will allow them to know what is happening to them
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 every moment . A possible solution to
this
 problem would be collaboration between
school
 and
parents
.
This
 could be achieved through explanation by
school
 members of possible consequences that may result. Some
parents
 do not monitor their children’s using
phones
. It is crucial to be in touch with each other. Schools can overcome
this
 issue by imposing strict rules which
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
 not allowing child to bring their
phones
 and teaching them about the drawbacks of
phones
 . In conclusion, after analysis of the causes, I believe that the use of mobile
phones
 in classrooms might affect children’s performance in
school
. To overcome
this
, I think that the main reason for
this
 behaviour is the willingness to play and watch videos. Another cause could be a lack of
parents
’ knowledge about the negative outcomes of
phone
 addiction, and they are ignoring
school’s
Correct article usage
the school’s
show examples
 roles.
Therefore
, it is important to communicate with schools regularly.
Submitted by afnan.sa1992 on

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Task Achievement
Try to elaborate more on the solutions by suggesting specific strategies or programs that schools and parents can implement. This can help strengthen the task achievement score.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a strong topic sentence, which clearly defines the main point before you provide supporting details. This helps in improving the logical structure.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use more transition words and phrases to ensure smoother connectivity between the ideas and paragraphs. This will help in enhancing the coherence of the essay.
Task Achievement
Each paragraph addresses specific aspects of the problem, with an identified cause and a proposed solution.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present, framing the essay effectively.
Task Achievement
The essay successfully identifies a common issue in a modern context and proposes realistic avenues for resolution.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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