Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is it a negative or positive development? Give your explanation using some relevant examples from your experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Putting extra
pressure
on
children
to achieve success has become a vital topic of debate.
While
some
parents
encourage
children
in accurate measures to become successful, others put excessive
pressure
on their
children
to achieve their goals and ambitions.
Although
there are various reasons
such
as failure in personal experience. I strongly believe that
this
trend can gradually
result
in harmful consequences
such
as a depressed feeling, which will be discussed.
Firstly
, feeling a sense of success and fulfilment among individuals, particularly the younger generation can offer various benefits
such
as happier
societies
.
Therefore
both
parents
and
societies
frequently exert countless pressures on
children
to become successful and mature.
Additionally
, if
parents
struggle to achieve their goals in their personal lives, they might put extra
pressure
on their
children
rather than encourage them in accurate strategies, to follow their personal ambitions. A prime illustration is a mother who has always dreamed of being a doctor.
As a
result
, these
parents
make an effort to equip
children
with extra
pressure
such
as numerous different educational curriculums for becoming successful in
further
education.
On the other hand
,
this
approach can significantly contribute to harmful effects for both
societies
and
children
.
Thus
, putting extra
pressure
on
children
not only can lead to unhappier and unsustainable
societies
but
also
can decrease a sense of confidence among
children
.
As a
result
, these
children
as young adults are likely to be challenged with various emotional problems
such
as stress and depression in the future.
For instance
, consider a student who is overwhelmed with his extracurricular program and does not have enough free time to play like other peers, So
This
child might encounter various emotional challenges
such
as feeling abundance and isolated. In conclusion,
Although
a significant number of
parents
are interested in putting extra
pressure
on their
children
,
due to
various reasons including their personal failure experiences,
this
trend can
result
in negative consequences
such
as an increase in depression and distress among
children
.
Submitted by mahanz on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure you maintain a clear logical flow by distinctly separating the reasons parents pressure children and the effects of this pressure. This can further strengthen your coherence. Consider summarizing key points lightly in the conclusion for added impact.
task achievement
While your response is complete, try to balance between discussing the positive and negative aspects for a more rounded exploration of the topic as some parents may feel the pressure is beneficial for children’s motivation.
coherence cohesion
Your essay effectively introduces the topic and concludes by reiterating your stance, which is indicative of a strong structural coherence.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples to support your points, such as the dream of a mother for her child, which illustrates a real-world application of your theme.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • prosperous future
  • highly competitive
  • extracurricular activities
  • social comparison
  • compelled
  • societal judgement
  • instill discipline
  • work ethic
  • responsibility
  • anxiety
  • diminished self-esteem
  • loss of interest
  • alienated
  • strained relationships
  • rebel
  • burnout
  • hinder
  • well-being
What to do next:
Look at other essays: