Some think spending a lot on birthday celebration and weddings is a waste of money. Others think that it is important for young people and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#think #birthday #celebration #weddings #waste #money #people #society

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Birthdays and wedding

cermonies

Correct your spelling

ceremonies

are

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

special occasions to celebrate worldwide.In my

openion

Correct your spelling

opinion

, these events are

source

Add an article

a source

the source

show examples

of feeling happy,

can

Correct word choice

and can

show examples

break the cycle of

borness

Correct your spelling

boredom

in our daily lives . Weddings are a unique event for all people allover the world ,

espeically

Correct your spelling

especially

if it

happened

Wrong verb form

happens

show examples

after a love story .

For example

, one of my friends did not enjoy celebrations in her life as much as enjoying her wedding night.she spent

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

of money on

this

day, she bought

very

Add an article

a very

the very

show examples

expensive dress.

Change preposition

From

show examples

her

prespectives

Correct your spelling

perspectives

perspective

wedding

Add an article

the wedding

a wedding

show examples

day is the only perfect and enjoyable day

through

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show examples

her life.

On the other hand

, Birthdays seem to be

improtant

Correct your spelling

important

to me , it means that

Change the capitalization

show examples

am getting older and more experienced, being

more wise

Replace the words

wiser

show examples

, and able to manage my thoughts and my futures plan in a better way ,

for instance

, my

last

18-8-1988 was my 36th 18-8-1988 , it was amazing and

Change the capitalization

show examples

enjoyed

that moments

Change the determiner

that moment

those moments

show examples

when

Change the capitalization

show examples

was surrounded by my family and friends, and one of the happiest

thing

Change to a plural noun

things

show examples

was when

Change the capitalization

show examples

recieved

Correct your spelling

received

fantastic gifts which

are belongs

Change the verb form

belong

show examples

to my preferences. Weddings and birthdays are

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

enjoyable life parties , spending money for our

Correct your spelling

spiritual

spirtiual

Correct your spelling

spiritual

happiness is one of the

cornerstone

Change to a plural noun

cornerstones

show examples

in our lives

Submitted by ghufran.mahmoud on Sun Nov 17 2024

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task achievement

Ensure the essay answers all parts of the question: discussing both views and giving your opinion.

task achievement

Include more specific examples to support your points about birthdays and weddings.

coherence cohesion

Organize the essay with clear paragraphs, using topic sentences to guide your reader.

coherence cohesion

Include a clear introduction and conclusion to frame the discussion.

task achievement

You have shared personal experiences, which makes the essay more relatable and engaging.

coherence cohesion

You have demonstrated the cultural significance of celebrations, adding depth to the discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

208 words

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Some think spending a lot on birthday celebration and weddings is a waste of money. Others think that it is important for young people and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

People find it very difficult to speak in public or to give a presentation before an audience.do you think public speaking skill is really important?should students be taught public speaking at school?

In mordern times, children are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. 1. Why has this change occured? 2. Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

unemployment rate of ireland. please make a summary and compared when relevant

nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?