Doctors in many countries are saying that people are not getting enough physical exercise. What are the causes of this? How it can be addressed?

Nowadays, medical doctors in many nations point out that
people
don’t have enough practice and
exercise
for their bodies.
This
essay will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the main causes of
this
trend and examine some possible solutions. A primary cause is
about
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apply
show examples
digital activities. In
contemporary
Add an article
the contemporary
show examples
era,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most
people
have entertainment without movement and they do most of their
work
with
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
,
also
, they communicate online with each other.
Likewise
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
FIFA is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
popular virtual game for boys
that
Correct word choice
and
show examples
it
is led
Wrong verb form
leads
show examples
them
stay
Fix the infinitive
to stay
show examples
at home and
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
do not outdoor activities. For
more
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apply
show examples
example,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most families use online
app
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apps
show examples
for ordering groceries and
home’s
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home
show examples
needs. These trends cause
to
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apply
show examples
less movement and physical
exercise
.
Moreover
,
people
have
hectic
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a hectic
show examples
life.
This
meant that
work
govern
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governs
show examples
on
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apply
show examples
their time and during the day, they just
work
, especially in
workplace
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the workplace
show examples
and
sitting
Wrong verb form
sit
show examples
on
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in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
seat, afterwards, they do not have
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
enough time to go to the gym and
exercise
. To address
this
issue,
they
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the
show examples
parent
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parents
show examples
can
enroll
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enrol
show examples
the
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on the
show examples
gym in the form of family 3 times a week with optional hours,
thus
children have to go with family and
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
exercise
together.
Moreover
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
put some rules that
work
time
start
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starts
show examples
at
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apply
show examples
late and
also
people
use
pedometer
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pedometers
show examples
when they go to the workplace.
Government
Correct article usage
The government
show examples
can put
reward
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rewards
show examples
such
as
bargain
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bargains
show examples
for many markets and free club enrollment.
Tu
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To
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sum up, there are many causes that
are led
Wrong verb form
lead
show examples
to less
exercise
and movement
such
as expanding online
game
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games
show examples
for children and online
market
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markets
show examples
for
adult
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adults
show examples
.
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
busy lifestyle can affect
to
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apply
show examples
this
problem.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
people
can increase their walking like going to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work
and they have to
work
out with their family.
Submitted by mellika.sadeghi1 on

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples to fully support your argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve transitions between sentences for better flow and clarity.
task achievement
The essay clearly addresses the task by discussing causes and potential solutions.
coherence cohesion
A well-structured introduction and conclusion frame the essay effectively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • digital entertainment
  • physical inactivity
  • recreational facilities
  • modern conveniences
  • remote work
  • high stress levels
  • streaming services
  • video games
  • social media
  • physical activity
  • accessibility
  • public awareness campaigns
  • health benefits
  • habit formation
What to do next:
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