Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possible. While others think that it should not start until seven years of age, discuss both views and give your opinion.

While
some believe in the idea of kickstarting the academic schooling of
children
at an early
age
, others reckon to delay the process until a kid turns seven
years
olds
Correct your spelling
old
show examples
. Introducing
kids
to formal education can help in the cognitive development of their brains,
as well as
lay the strong basement for their future
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
.
However
, I believe,
not
Correct word choice
that not
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initiating schooling for
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
few
years
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
children
more time to connect with their
parents
and develop new creative interests.
First
and foremost, preschool
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
been helping little ones to develop the ability to think learn and remember.
This
development,
furthermore
helps the youngsters to perform extraordinary in their formal education. Ultimately,
children
who have an early start
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
can easily surpass other
kids
who
stayed
Wrong verb form
stay
show examples
at home.Not only young
kids
can score higher grades in school but are likely to achieve prestige positions in high-end colleges
hence
Correct word choice
and hence
show examples
become successful in life.
For example
, the average grades of
kids
who have started at the
age
of three in comparison to the
age
of seven
years
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
significantly higher. I
consider
Verb problem
believe
show examples
parents
and
children
can deeply connect with each other during
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
few
years
and
kids
can be motivated to take part in other innovative skills.
That is
to say,
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
on one
Correct your spelling
one-on-one
show examples
time with their
parents
can help them learn fundamental morals and ethics.
Moreover
, having all
this
free time can push youngsters to become creative and imaginative.
Children
can show willingness
in learning
Change preposition
to learn
show examples
to sing songs, play baseball and
painting
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paint
show examples
.
For instance
, Justin Bieber
develops
Wrong verb form
developed
show examples
an interest in music at a very young
age
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and decided to pursue it as a career. In conclusion,
Although
, sending
kids
to school in
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
few
years
, can make them intelligent and successful in
Correct pronoun usage
their lives
show examples
lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
, giving them
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
few
years
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
can be a building blog of their love for
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
show examples
and something extraordinary and artistic.
Submitted by arvindpreet5040 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • formal education
  • receptive to learning
  • absorb information
  • social skills
  • interactive learning
  • structured educational environment
  • cognitive and motor skills
  • play-based learning
  • emotional development
  • creativity
  • natural learning processes
  • peer interaction
  • stress and burnout
  • academic performance
  • developmental readiness
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