IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many people continue to use cars and motorcycles even though they know that they are bad for the environment. Why is this? What can be done to reduce the use of these vehicles?

#people #cars #motorcycles #environment #vehicles
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Many
people
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 continue to use
cars
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 and motorcycles even though they know that they are bad for the
environment
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. Why is
this
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? What can be done to reduce the use of these
vehicles
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?
Cars
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 and motorcycles are popular modes of transportation. Several
people
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 often claim that these high-speed
vehicles
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 have been widely used by individuals, despite knowing the negative impacts of these on the
environment
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.
This
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essay
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 will discuss the reasons for the continuation of using motorized
vehicles
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, including savings of time and labour for the riders.
This
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essay
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 will
also
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 suggest
the
Correct article usage
apply
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solutions to reducing the application of fast-moving
transports
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transport
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,
such
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 as launching less polluting
vehicles
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 and motivating the owners to purchase green
cars
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.
Although
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 there are a considerable number of impacts of driving
cars
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 or bikes on the atmosphere, passengers have been continuously riding on these transports to get the benefits of using speedy and cost-effective
vehicles
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. Motorized commuters are highly convenient, and an individual can travel a long distance in the shortest possible time by dint of automated engines of automated
vehicles
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.
For instance
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, automobiles are far more suitable for reaching a longer distance than other means of transport
such
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 as bicycles or walking. Considering all the positive aspects of utilizing fuel-driven
vehicles
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, the passengers mostly ignore the side effects of these
vehicles
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 on the
environment
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.
People
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 should make a balance faster
traveling
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travelling
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 to reach a distant place and protect the
environment
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 from the pollution of motorized commuters.
Firstly
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, renewable and environmentally friendly four-wheelers and bikes should be introduced to ensure the fastest means of the journey by a cheap and sustainable energy source.
Secondly
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, environmentally sustainable transport
such
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 as bicycles and electric bikes need to be promoted for shorter distances to lower the emissions of pollutant substances in the
environment
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. In conclusion, fossil-fuel-driven transport is popular among all classes of
people
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. The
essay
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 discussed the causes for using automated
vehicles
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 though it is detrimental to our atmosphere.
This
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essay
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also
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 suggested solutions to the problems mentioned above.
Submitted by moon2014angel on

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task achievement
You have effectively addressed both parts of the question by discussing why people continue to use cars and motorcycles and suggesting solutions to reduce their use. Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, covering all the necessary points.
task achievement
While you have provided some examples, consider adding more specific examples to strengthen your points. For instance, you could cite cities that have successfully implemented policies to reduce car usage.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, ensure to maintain logical flow consistently by connecting your points more seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central point and that points flow logically from one to the next. You might consider using more cohesive devices to further improve the flow of ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a strong introduction and conclusion, clearly outlining the issues and summarizing the solutions discussed.
coherence cohesion
The main points are consistently supported throughout the essay, making your argument more persuasive.
task achievement
Your response is both relevant and comprehensive, effectively tackling the issue of vehicle use and its environmental impact.
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