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Band 6.5

Nowadays not enough students choose science subjects at university in many countries. Why is this? Whateffect does this have on society?

#students #science #subjects #university #countries #whateffect #society
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Today, in many monopolies the percentage of students who choose science
subjects
Use synonyms
 at university has reduced.
While
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 the reason for
this
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 is a complicated study, it can lead us to stop technological advancement.
To begin
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 with, it is difficult for applicants to learn exact
subjects
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 at university. There are a huge amount of theories in sciences that need to be learnt and always memorized. Since students can not cope with a lot of information
as well as
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 formulas, they tend to leave the academy.
For example
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,
according to
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 the statistics for the
last
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 few years about 70 per cent of pupils whose main direction is
such
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subjects
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 as math, physics and chemistry tend to leave universities in the second year of study. From their point of view main issue was a great number of theories, which were not only possible to be reminded of but
also
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 led to several mental illnesses.
Thus
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, because of numbers theories, students leave
academy
Add an article
the academy
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. Regarding to impact on society, we might be able to frustrated with the stagnation of technologies, since all technologies strongly connect with exact math and physics. These
subjects
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 are the fundament of the world of AI.
For example
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: Japan has been able to grow from an unfortunate country to a member of the Big 7 thanks to technological resources. Their scientists have essential meaning both at schools and at work.
Thus
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, if exact sciences are not learnt, we will not have a rise. In conclusion,
while
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 the reason for the reduced amount of men at scientific educational
institution
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institutions
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 is difficult to study, it has an impact on evolution. If we do not pay more attention to it now, we will not be able to have technological growth in the future.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Task Response
The essay can be improved by providing more clear and precise explanations for the points made. Try to expand on why sciences have a significant impact on technological growth with more specific details.
Coherence and Cohesion
Further work is needed to improve grammar, spelling, and punctuation. Small grammatical errors and awkward phrasings can affect the clarity of your ideas. Proofreading can help minimize these errors.
Coherence and Cohesion
Adding transition words can help improve the flow of your essay. Use words like 'furthermore,' 'in addition,' and 'consequently' to connect your ideas more smoothly.
Task Response
You provided relevant and specific examples, such as mentioning Japan and its technological growth. This demonstrates a good understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-linked and present a clear overview and summary of the essay's main points.
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