In many countries it is now illegal to advertise alcohol. Do you agree or disagree?

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Adverts for beer, wine, and spirits are now banned in many nations.

This

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essay agrees with

this

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policy because

alcohol

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consumption can lead to serious

health

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and social problems, and advertising can unfairly influence people to drink more than they should.

To begin

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with, advertising alcoholic beverages should be banned because

alcohol

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is harmful to

health

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. Excessive drinking causes several severe conditions, including liver cancer, diabetes, and brain damage.

In addition

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, these

health

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issues place a significant burden on healthcare systems, causing suffering not only for patients but

also

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for their families.

For example

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, Russia faced a major problem with alcoholism, which resulted in high rates of

alcohol

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-related deaths among men.

However

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, after banning the promotion of alcoholic beverages on TV and in print media, the country saw a significant reduction in

such

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cases. Another point to consider is the manipulative nature of

alcohol

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advertising. The primary goal of marketing campaigns is to sell more products, often without regard for the harm they may cause.

Moreover

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alcohol

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commercials frequently portray drinking as glamorous or desirable, appealing to emotions and status rather than addressing the dangers of overconsumption.

For instance

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, Hennessy advertisements often depict a sophisticated man in a luxurious setting, enjoying a drink with a beautiful woman, creating an illusion of success and elegance.

While

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some ads include a brief warning to “drink responsibly,” these warnings are typically overshadowed by the enticing visuals. In conclusion,

although

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opinions on

this

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issue may differ, I firmly believe that

alcohol

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is a hazardous product, and advertisers should not be permitted to promote its consumption. For both public

health

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and ethical reasons, I believe that more countries should implement bans on

alcohol

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advertising.

aaljaniniSat Nov 23 2024

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task achievement

Consider adding more specific data or studies to strengthen the claims about health issues related to alcohol consumption.

coherence cohesion

Reinforce the flow of your essay by using more linking phrases.

coherence cohesion

The essay effectively introduces the topic and presents a clear position, which is maintained throughout the essay.

task achievement

The essay includes relevant examples such as the situation in Russia to support the argument effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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In many countries it is now illegal to advertise alcohol. Do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think governments should spend money looking for life on other planets, while others think that there are many unsolved problems on earth. Discuss both views and give your opinion.