IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people. Why is this the case and what can be done to attract more local people to visit these places?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays,
tourists
Use synonyms
 to prefer visit
museums
Use synonyms
 and historical places, rather than inhabitants. Because travellers want to learn the national traditions and history of these cities. I will analyze the main reasons for
this
Linking Words
 trend and suggest ideas to encourage local citizens to visit these areas more often. One main reason for the low attendance of local
people
Use synonyms
 to
museums
Use synonyms
 and old buildings is that they already visited them several times or even know some basic data about their history.
Additionally
Linking Words
, for local citizens places will be fascinating for foreign guests, as they are always accessible to natives.
Moreover
Linking Words
, local
people
Use synonyms
 often assume they can come to these places whenever they want, leading to low visitation rates.
For example
Linking Words
, Baku city with a famous historical and art museum, local
people
Use synonyms
 may have visited during school trips or family activities in their childhood.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they become familiar with exhibits and the museum’s history, paving the way for a sense of self-satisfaction.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, first-time
tourists
Use synonyms
 are excited to explore the
museums
Use synonyms
, leading to high attendance rates among them,
whereas
Linking Words
 local
people
Use synonyms
. To solve
this
Linking Words
 problem and to attract more attention from local residents,
museums
Use synonyms
 and historical sites should organize unexpected exhibitions that they have never seen before.
For instance
Linking Words
, overseas countries organise different exhibitions every year. They demonstrate very unusual, fascinating projects that are interesting not only to
tourists
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 to locals because they have never seen anything like
this
Linking Words
 before.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 most
tourists
Use synonyms
 prefer to visit
museums
Use synonyms
, the government could attract the attention of residents by offering new and curious experiences.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Expand on why local people might not feel the need to revisit or explore museums beyond their initial visits. Consider cultural or social factors that might influence this behavior.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples or case studies that would better illustrate your points, possibly drawing on specific museums or historical sites and their strategies to engage local visitors.
coherence cohesion
Ensure all main points are clearly supported and related back to why museums are geared more towards tourists than local visitors. This will enhance the argument and make it more convincing.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
The topic is directly addressed and the reasons why tourists prefer to visit local museums and historical sites are identified.
coherence cohesion
The potential solution to attract more local visitors is clearly stated and supported with a practical example.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Take for granted
  • Economical constraints
  • Routine obligations
  • Programming
  • Cater
  • Engagement
  • Community involvement
  • Personal connection
  • Cultural relevance
  • Discounts
  • Sense of ownership
  • Interactive exhibits
  • Local traditions
  • Field trips
  • Cultural bond
What to do next:
Look at other essays: