IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In an increasingly globalized world, communicating in English is becoming an essential skill. Some people argue that it should become an official language in Vietnam. This means English would be used ingovernment, legal documents, education, and other official communications. The government of Vietnam should make English an official language. Do you agree or disagree?

#world #english #skill #people #language #vietnam #ingovernment #documents #education #communications #government
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
English
Use synonyms
 is becoming a global
language
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 and
nowaday
Correct your spelling
nowadays
show examples
comunicating
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communicating
 in
English
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 is important for
eveyone
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everyone
 who
want
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wants
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 to
devenlop
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develop
 their lives.
But
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However
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 I am not sure that the government in
Vietnam
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 should make
English
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 an official
language
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, which
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
 be great for
Vietnamese
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people
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. Because
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Vietnamese
Change the article
the Vietnamese
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language
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overcame
Verb problem
took
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 a range of years to
devenlop
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develop
 by
Vietnamese
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people
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, it became beautiful and
connect
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connects
show examples
 history with
present
Add an article
the present
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.
History
Correct article usage
The history
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 of
Vietnam
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 strongly proved that
Vietnamese
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people
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 protected their nation, their land and so on.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
language
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 too, they always want to protect and
maintan
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maintain
 it forever.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
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Correct article usage
the Vietnamese
show examples
Vietnamese
Correct article usage
the Vietnamese
show examples
Correct your spelling
language
lauguage
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language
 is
Correct article usage
an important
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important
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an important
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 and necessary culture, and you know, on over the world, we only have any nations
Correct pronoun usage
that have
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have
Correct pronoun usage
that have
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Use synonyms
Correct article usage
a language
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language
Correct article usage
a language
show examples
 for them. Personally, I am
Vietnamese
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, I prefer to not
making
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
 any
language
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 an
officical
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official
language
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 in
Vietnam
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, including
English
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. I want to keep my
language
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 forever, I always talk with my friends: "
English
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 is a tool
Correct pronoun usage
that help
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help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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 us, it not
changes
Wrong verb form
change
show examples
 my mind". So I love my voice, love my speech and I think the United
State
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States
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 or the United
Kingdoms
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Kingdom's
show examples
people
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,
they
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apply
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also
Linking Words
 love their
language
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 and want to
maintan
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maintain
 it in their nation, and changing
official
Correct article usage
the official
show examples
language
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 can not help
people
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, but that
also
Linking Words
 has a lot of
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
show examples
 not solve.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
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 that, I can not deny that
English
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 is
vey
Correct your spelling
very
 important
for
Change preposition
to
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 me. If I want to have a job with
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 income or
devenlop
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develop
developed
 myself or
travelling
Wrong verb form
travel
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arroud
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around
 the world, I need
English
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 to
comunicate
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communicate
. Learning
English
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 helps me connect with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other, and I am more confident,
I
Correct word choice
that I
show examples
can demonstrate my
oppions
Correct your spelling
opinions
options
 in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 big presentation. I
also
Linking Words
 meet someone who I don't
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
 that I can meet. Importantly, I can look up a range of information about my major
by
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in
show examples
English
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. It
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
 me a
lots
Correct the article-noun agreement
lot
show examples
.
Conclution
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Conclusion
,
English
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 is so important and
neccessary
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necessary
 for everyone, but it should not be
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 official
language
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 in
Vietnam
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. In my
oppinion
Correct your spelling
opinion
,
English
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 should be
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 true
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 its mission. Each
Vietnamese
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people
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 should
be say
Change the verb form
say
show examples
Vietnamese
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 daily, and teach their children that we have a beautiful
language
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Andy on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that logical connectors are used consistently and appropriately to enhance the flow of ideas. This will make the transitions between paragraphs and sections clearer.
task achievement
Develop your arguments further with more detailed examples and evidence. This will help strengthen your position and demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear personal stance on the topic, which is presented at the beginning and reflected upon in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
An introduction and conclusion are clearly defined, setting up the essay well and closing the argument effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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