Some people think the the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, instead of benefiting them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is no denying the fact that the teaching system is critical for academic growth and other purposes in life in general.

While

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it is a commonly held belief that, turning children into good members and workers is the main goal of schools

instead

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of benefiting them as individuals, there is

also

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an argument that opposes it.

However

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, I would argue that school is of paramount importance to be both helpful and productive members of society.

To begin

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with, schools do play a crucial role in shaping individuals into responsible citizens and members of society.

In other words

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, many children can learn a variety of things in school

such

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as how to be a successful individual or to be helpful to the world.

In addition

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students

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can show their potential in the classroom, and

as a result

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, teachers can help them to utilize their abilities in a beneficial way.

For example

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, if one of the

students

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is interested in math, the teacher can help him develop and expand his intelligence and be more creative and productive in the math field. Another point to consider, it is

also

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crucial to acknowledge that education should prioritize individual development and well-being. It is

also

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possible to say that,

Students

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have unique talents, interests, and aspirations that should be nurtured and encouraged.

Moreover

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, focusing on producing only good citizens and workers may steal their creativity and productivity.

For instance

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, if the education system only focused on creating workers, it might lead to depression for many children and unproductive individuals. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I strongly believe that the schooling system has the power to produce well-educated and responsible citizens; It can

also

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help authorities identify talented

students

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and provide them with opportunities to develop their knowledge and creativity.

deemaalkhathlan1Thu Jun 20 2024

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coherence cohesion

To achieve a higher score, focus on elaborating and providing deeper insights into your main points. Try to avoid using repetitive phrases and ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to maintain strong cohesion.

task achievement

Ensure that each idea is fully developed and supported with specific examples or evidence, as this can strengthen the argument presented. This will help in making your essay more convincing and comprehensive.

task achievement

Be consistent in your use of formal academic language, avoiding informal phrases. Variations in sentence structure and vocabulary can enhance the elegance of your writing.

introduction conclusion present

The essay has a clear and concise introduction, outlining the argument and the position you take effectively. This helps set the context for the reader right away.

logical structure

Each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph, which aids in the logical structure and in guiding the reader through your arguments.

supported main points

Relevant and specific examples have been used to support the main points, particularly the example regarding the math student. These examples help to illustrate your points effectively.

12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

citizenship
workforce readiness
individual development
talents and passions
responsible citizens
emotional intelligence
personal well-being
personal growth
functioning democracy
mental health
personal happiness
dual role
neglect
engaged citizens
nurturing
balance

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Some people think the the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, instead of benefiting them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

One group of people prefer to live in houses that have fewer tall buildings, while others prefer the opposite. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Write a letter to your friend about a book that you have read recently. Include the following in your letter: - Describe the book. - Why do you want him/her to read it? - Tell him/her how to get the book.

Companies use a variety of methods to improve the sales of their products. What are those methods? Which is the most effective method?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?