IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

the two maps below show the road access to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010. summurise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

the two maps below show the road access to a city hospital in 2007 and 2010. summurise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
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The diagram shows 2 stages of “City Hospital” ’s development: 2007 and 2010 . In 2007 “City Hospital” was built close to a City
Road
Use synonyms
, with only one leading
road
Use synonyms
 to its entrance, called “Hospital Rd”.
Besides
Linking Words
 that “City Hospital” had 6 bus stations, with 3 of them located on each
side
Use synonyms
 of
leading
Correct article usage
the leading
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road
Use synonyms
 “Hospital Rd”. The Car Park was
also
Linking Words
 included in “City Hospital” for both personal staff and
public
Correct article usage
the public
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.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
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 the Ring
Road
Use synonyms
 was built around the “City Hospital” for a better moving experience. In 2010 the infrastructure of “City Hospital” was completely redesigned. These changes included: * Adding 2 roundabouts on each
side
Use synonyms
 of “Hospital Rd” ‘s
road
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. * Building a special section for a bus station and connecting it between the 2 roundabouts on the left
side
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 of “Hospital Rd” ‘s
road
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. * Separating public and
staff only
Add a hyphen
staff-only
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 car parks. The car park that was used for both of them is now for personal staff only and a new section was
build
Wrong verb form
built
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 for public use only, that was located on the
right hand
Add a hyphen
right-hand
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side
Use synonyms
 of a „ City Hospital" 's ring
raad
Correct your spelling
road
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. During
this
Linking Words
 period “City Hospital” has
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
faced a significant amount of changes
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
for both moving and using experience.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words “city, hospital”, road, rd”, side with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.
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