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Writing Samples
Band 6

While some people consider global warming to be the most pressing environmental problem now, others believe that deforestation has a more detrimental effect. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #deforestation #effect
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"The climate crisis is the result of human's ecological footprint". The issue of environmental challenges has sparked a considerable amount of debate and controversy. Some groups of people opine that
,
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 temperature heating is the major problem,
whereas
 , others state that, clearing of trees has more harmfulness. In my perspective, the latter statement appears to be more rational.
This
 essay intends to delve into both viewpoints. On the one hand, there is a consensus that disagrees with the statement that climate change is the most detrimental conundrum,
this
 is because the extinction of forests itself is the prime cause of global warming. To explain
further
, cutting trees which are responsible for the absorption of carbon dioxide. We are indirectly inviting manifold challenges of which we are not even aware.
However
,
this
 predicament can be alleviated if we take early action and protect flora and fauna.
Hence
, it is clear to state that deforestation is a grave problem as compared to environmental changes.
On the other hand
, there is the side, that advocates the notion that global heating is a most pressing problem as it is directly affecting human life.
Similarly
, the impact of
this
 phenomenon is rising temperatures, melting ice caps, and increasing frequency of extreme weather events, which is a threat to human life and biodiversity.
Therefore
, many individuals opine that government authorities should stop
this
 situation from exacerbating by educating people through public awareness campaigns and better conservation efforts.
Although
,
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 the temperature change is terrifying, I will still contend that
this
 can be shunned by protective measures, unlike, logging , which is the main rationale of
an
Correct article usage
the
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 above-furnished conundrum. To recapitulate, based on the above-mentioned counter-arguments, it can be reiterated that because deforestation is directly linked to global warming,
this
 can be the gravest concern compared to all other phenomena.
Overall
, little mindfulness and scrutiny can be vital to address
this
 challenge.
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task achievement
Strengthen your arguments by providing clearer examples for both global warming and deforestation. For instance, you could mention specific instances of deforestation and its direct impact on local and global climates.
coherence cohesion
Improve the coherence by using more linking words and phrases that signal a relationship, such as 'as a result', 'consequently', or 'moreover'. This will help the flow between your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction is well-presented, but the conclusion could summarize the main points more distinctly. Consider directly restating your main argument in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The introduction sets a clear context and presents the main perspectives in the debate, which gives a solid introduction to the issues at hand.
task achievement
Your argument regarding the relationship between deforestation and global warming is compelling and clearly articulated.
coherence cohesion
The essay's structure, which presents both sides and then gives a personal opinion, is effective and maintains a clear organization throughout.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • pressing environmental problem
  • detrimental effect
  • global warming
  • deforestation
  • rising temperatures
  • melting ice caps
  • extreme weather events
  • biodiversity loss
  • carbon emissions
  • water cycle disruption
  • ecosystems
  • forest growth
  • carbon dioxide
  • mitigation strategies
  • renewable energy sources
  • reforestation
  • scale of impact
  • human intervention
  • long-term consequences
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