IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that there will be a reduction in air travel in the future. Do you think that this trend is positive or negative?

#people #reduction #air #travel #future #trend
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In
current
Add an article
the current
show examples
 era,
due to
Change preposition
apply
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 technological advancement
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 transformed many
aspect
Change to a plural noun
aspects
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 of life and
air
 travelling is no exception.but some
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 think that there will be a reduction in
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of
air
travel
.I think
this
 is the negative
treand
Correct your spelling
trend
 and my inclination would be
justifyied
Correct your spelling
justified
 in
following
Change the article
the following
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 paragraph.
Firstly
, there are numerous benefits of
travel
Correct your spelling
travelling
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 by
flights
Fix the agreement mistake
flight
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 but the most significant one is that it
help
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helps
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 to
economy
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economic
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 growth of
country
Add an article
the country
a country
show examples
.Put
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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in
another words
Replace the adjective
another word
other words
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,
Air
travel
 is the most
imporant
Correct your spelling
important
 to attract
tourisam
Correct article usage
the tourisam
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 industry which
direcly
Correct your spelling
directly
impact
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impacts
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 to
incresed
Correct your spelling
increase
increased
 a job, tax revenue and
mordern
Correct your spelling
modern
 facility and as a
results
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result
show examples
country
Change noun form
country's
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 economy would
be boost
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be boosted
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.
Moreover
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Moreover,
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 it is more convenient and
help
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helps
show examples
 to maintain
the
Correct article usage
apply
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family
relation
Fix the agreement mistake
relations
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.
for
Capitalize word
For
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instant
Replace the word
instance
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 individuals can visit their family who reside
any
Change preposition
in any
show examples
 corner of the world.
Apart from
this
 traveling by
air
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
also
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 to maintain
nations
Change noun form
nations'
nation's
show examples
 global
relation
Fix the agreement mistake
relations
show examples
 as country leaders can meet with each other at any time which is
now a days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
 more
imporant
Correct your spelling
important
. for
this
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
reasons
Add a comma
reasons,
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 many people believe that
air
travel
 is
neccessory
Correct your spelling
necessary
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
today and in future.
On the other hand
,
There
Fix capitalization
there
show examples
 are some demerits
for
Change preposition
to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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air
travel
,
that
is
Correct your spelling
as
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air
polluation
Correct your spelling
pollution
. As flights
emits
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emit
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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gases that
creat
Correct your spelling
create
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green house
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greenhouse
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 and
responsible
Add a missing verb
are responsible
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 for climate change.Another biggest
disadvantages
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
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 is
that
Correct word choice
apply
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the cost.
Air
travel
 is
the
Change the article
apply
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expensive
that
Correct word choice
and
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 is not convenient
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 average people as the fuel and
air
maintance
Correct your spelling
maintenance
, technology and security contribute to be
price
Add an article
the price
show examples
 of
air
 transportation.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
this
 mitigation can be reduced by proper planning and observation. In
colclusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
As
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
there are some disadvantages like
its
Correct your spelling
it is
show examples
 more expensive and
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air
 pollution but its advantages like
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 to increase
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
economy
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 growth,it is more convenient and
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 to
stronger
Replace the word
strengthen
show examples
 the bond between the nations
that is
 why it is a negative trend if there will be a reduction in
air
travel
 in future.
Submitted by Surbhi on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines the main ideas that will be discussed in the essay. A more structured introduction will help set the stage for your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your points. This will make your argument more coherent and easier to follow.
Task Response
Develop a more balanced argument by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of air travel in relation to the future trend. This will provide a more comprehensive view.
Task Response
Provide more detailed examples and evidence to support your points. Specific examples can strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the topic by discussing both benefits and drawbacks of air travel and takes a clear stance.
Coherence and Cohesion
A conclusion is present, summarizing the main arguments made in the essay, which helps reinforce the writer's position.
Task Achievement
The essay includes relevant examples, such as the impact on tourism and family connections, which help illustrate the points made.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon emissions
  • sustainable alternatives
  • aviation sector
  • economic consequences
  • renewable fuels
  • climate change efforts
  • global connectivity
  • tourism industry
  • technological advancements
  • cultural exchanges
  • international trade
  • travel experience
  • airport congestion
  • job losses
  • carbon footprint
What to do next:
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