Some people argue that children should not watch television as it can have a negative effect on their development. Others claim that television can help them in their future. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Many people reckon that indulging in
television
consumption is detrimental to the development of
children
;
however
, others are more drawn to the idea that it is beneficial for their future.
While
both decisions have equally valid merits, I personally believe it proves more advantageous to avoid watching
TV
rather than being busy
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
watching films or cartoons. Admittedly, there are a number of reasons why it is good to take up with
TV
programmes. First and foremost, as educational content might be one of these factors, it may be beneficial in imparting information
that is
valuable to their lives and academic pursuits.
For instance
, channels like National Geographic or Discovery can expand
children
's knowledge about science, culture, and the environment.
As a consequence
, they have a chance to be aware of the news and can gain the necessary knowledge for their studies. On top of that, another reason for
this
phenomenon can be language and cognitive skill development. Not only do youngsters watch cultural programmes, but they
also
can look at age-appropriate shows in other languages or those focused on problem-solving exercises which can improve linguistic and analytical skills.
This
, in turn, leads to a highly interactive young generation who are given an opportunity to gain these skills through watching
television
. As much as I acknowledge the points above, I tend to believe that avoiding kids from
TV
content is more crucial as there are many negative impacts on them. One of these is that prolonged screen time can contribute to issues, ranging from obesity, and poor posture to eye strain. Case in point, studies have shown that
children
spending more than 4 hours daily watching
television
are prone to sedentary lifestyle diseases.
This
, in effect, causes varied health problems which may be both mental and physical.
Furthermore
, distraction from education and hobbies is another main contributor. If a child is addicted to cartoons reducing time for reading or engaging in creative activities
such
as drawing or sports, it may neglect homework or social interactions. These amusements,
consequently
, may be harmful as they result in
children
's laziness.
To conclude
,
while
some people are in favour of watching
TV
content in order to learn new skills and languages, I am of the opinion that it is more indispensable to limit their time
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
television
since it is distracting
as well as
damaging to their performances and health.
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task achievement
To enhance task achievement, consider providing more specific examples to support your points. This will demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Ensure that your main points are consistently clear and comprehensive. At times, ideas can be slightly condensed together, leading to a potential loss in clarity.
coherence cohesion
In terms of coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. While transitions are generally good, ensure there is a seamless link that clearly ties each idea to the next.
coherence cohesion
While the essay structure is solid, ensure that your introduction and conclusion are in complete alignment with the main points of the body paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides a balanced discussion of both views on the topic.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion that frames the argument well.
coherence cohesion
Ideas are generally well-organized, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the argument.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates insightfulness by acknowledging the benefits of television and then clearly stating a personal stance.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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