It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement.

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Suffice it to say, that we live in an extremely fast-paced, and yet very volatile world, and it would be a complete understatement, that many individuals are highly concerned with their economic situation.
Hence
, people are convinced, that it is crucial to save enough monetary funds for future times. From one point of view, there is a plethora of reasons why a lot of men and women of all ages nowadays are trying to accumulate as much monetary funds as possible, and,
consequently
, achieve financial stability. Having witnessed many economic crises, not only do people try their hardest to prepare for difficult times, unexpected situations, extra expenditures or inflation, but they
also
strive for a sense of protection, security, confidence and comfort.
Additionally
, some individuals just want to save enough money
while
being young and full of energy, to successfully use them after retirement.
However
, it is important to note, that in a lot of cases, the process of achieving financial stability turns into a grind, completely draining all physical and mental resources of an individual, and even transforming into an obsession, for it is almost impossible to clearly predict the economic situation in the world. As an example, the global financial crisis in 2008 struck unexpectedly, and
as a result
, many people, despite accumulating sufficient funds
while
preparing earlier for Y2K, lost their savings, jobs and even properties in some cases. In conclusion,
while
I firmly believe, that it is crucial for everyone to save money for the future, it is simultaneously important to remain level-headed, for it is almost impossible to accumulate enough finances and be prepared for everything.
Submitted by smackerprince on

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Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance coherence, ensure that each paragraph logically flows from one to the next, possibly by using transitional phrases or words to better connect your ideas.
Task Response
Use more specific examples to support your main points, which can make your arguments more compelling and relatable.
Task Response
While the essay is well-structured, consider further elaborating on certain points to fully engage the reader and provide a comprehensive understanding of your perspective.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively frame the discussion of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Each paragraph has a distinct focus and contributes to the overall argument, demonstrating a good logical structure.
Task Response
The essay offers a balanced view, acknowledging multiple perspectives on the importance of saving money.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • safety net
  • unforeseen circumstances
  • emergencies
  • future investments
  • retirement planning
  • financial discipline
  • habit of saving
  • amassing wealth
  • substantial fund
  • opportunity cost
  • additional income
  • inflation
  • purchasing power
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