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The chart below shows the results of three surveys on absenteeism in a particular European country in the years of 2000, 2005 and 2010. The results show the reasons people gave for not going to work.

The chart below shows the results of three surveys on absenteeism in a particular European country in the years of 2000, 2005 and 2010. The results show the reasons people gave for not going to work.
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This
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 bar chart illustrates worker absenteeism rates, expressed as percentages, in a European country for the years 2000, 2005, and 2010.
Overall
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, in both three years because of illness, most
people
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 did not go to
work
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 but the smallest percentage of respondents suffered from
stress
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. As the bar chart shows, in 2000 because of illness 45% of workers did not go to
work
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. Approximately 25% of workers did not go to
work
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 because of family responsibilities
however
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 10% of
people
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 did not go to
work
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 because of personal needs. And from
stress
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 and unexpected problems about 5% and 10% of individuals were absent from
work
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 respectively.When it comes to 2005 the
most
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apply
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highest percentage of individuals who were absent from
work
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 was 40% because of illness but the smallest percentage was 5% because of
stress
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. From Personal needs and family responsibilities which
people
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 could not go to
work
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 the percentages were the same about 25%. In 2010, 35% of workers did not go to
work
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due to
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 they have problems with their health.About 13%, 20% and 23% of
people
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 were absent from their
work
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due to
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stress
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, personal needs and family responsibilities
however
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 respectively.About 17% of
people
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 were absent from
work
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due to
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 unexpected problems.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "due to, however".
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, work, stress with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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