IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

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Scientists perform several
experiments
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 on
animals
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 for new discoveries or to
study
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 their behaviour.
While
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 some argue that
this
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 experimentation is necessary for scientific discoveries, others believe that it should be completely banned.
This
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 essay will discuss the situations under which
experiments
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 on
animals
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 can be justified and provide alternate
solutions
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. Performing
experiments
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 on
animals
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 can be justified if they are studied in their natural habitat, and there is no harm involved in research methods.
However
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, the practicals performed in laboratories should be outlawed because they undermine the freedom of
animals
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.
Moreover
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, if
animals
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 are given harmful medicines to
study
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 their behaviour
then
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 it is
also
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 unjustifiable.
For example
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, scientists often
study
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 the effects of new drugs on
animals
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 which can be detrimental to their health. So, any scientific
study
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 which can be harmful to
animals
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' health and disturb their life should not be allowed. As these
experiments
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 are critical for scientific discoveries, alternate
solutions
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 should be developed to perform practical studies. One alternative can be the use of harmless medicines
while
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 keeping them in sanctuaries under supervision.
Additionally
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, in case of any emergency,
due to
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 the side effects of drugs, antidotes should be readily available to save their lives. Another alternative can be the use of advanced technology to avoid direct
experiments
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 on
animals
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.
For instance
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, scientific studies can be done by using blood samples of
animals
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 which can be examined using advanced tools. So, there can be many alternate
solutions
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 to direct experimentation on
animals
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 if scientists take advantage of modern techniques. In conclusion, experimentation on
animals
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 is unjustifiable if it involves the risk to their health and life. Hard
experiments
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 performed by keeping
animals
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 in laboratories can be outlawed.
However
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, alternate
solutions
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 can be adopted
such
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 as the use of the latest technology and harmless drugs with their antidotes.

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introduction conclusion present
Your introduction sets the stage well by presenting both sides of the argument. It could be further improved by providing a brief outline of your main points.
complete response
The essay successfully covers the task by addressing whether animal experimentation can be justified and proposing alternatives. However, diving deeper into specific examples or studies that show successful alternatives might strengthen your points.
logical structure
Make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. For example, transitioning from justifications to alternatives can use a connecting sentence to enhance flow.
logical structure
Your essay is well-organized, with each paragraph focusing on a separate aspect of the discussion.
introduction conclusion present
A clear introduction and conclusion help frame your arguments effectively, providing clarity to the reader.
relevant specific examples
The use of examples like harmless medicines and blood sample analysis illustrates your points, supporting your argument convincingly.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • scientific breakthroughs
  • ethical concerns
  • alternatives
  • animal testing
  • moral implications
  • ethical considerations
  • vivisection
  • research methods
  • ethical dilemmas
  • animal welfare
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