In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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The phenomenon of large-scale
migration
from rural
areas
to
cities
has increased over the years.
This
trend is often driven by the promise of better
opportunities
in urban
areas
compared to rural ones.
However
,
this
migration
has led to a decrease in the rural population. In my opinion,
this
is a negative development for several reasons.
To begin
with, it cannot be denied that many major
cities
around the world are experiencing overpopulation.
This
is partly
due to
the
migration
of
people
from the countryside seeking better living conditions.
While
there are valid reasons for
this
migration
such
as better
job
opportunities
and improved living standards—
this
shift can strain the resources and economy of the city.
For instance
, Jakarta, one of the most expensive
cities
in Indonesia, sees a large influx of
people
every year from smaller
cities
. Many move to Jakarta in search of a better life.
However
, studies have shown that
this
migration
negatively impacts the city’s economy. The cost of living, including housing, healthcare, and daily expenses, has risen dramatically in recent years. The
job
market
also
cannot meet the growing demand, leading to higher unemployment rates.
As a result
, the quality of life in Jakarta deteriorates as more
people
struggle with lower incomes and increased living costs.
Moreover
, living in the countryside is not necessarily a negative choice. The cost of living in rural
areas
remains stable, and
job
opportunities
could be developed if the government invests in local industries.
This
would allow residents to stay in rural
areas
while
still benefiting from better economic
opportunities
. In conclusion, I firmly believe that the
migration
of rural
people
to
cities
is a negative development. The government should focus on developing rural
areas
by creating more
job
opportunities
and improving local infrastructure, rather than concentrating solely on urban growth.
Submitted by salwaputrihardiyan on

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Coherence and Cohesion
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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph links back to your overall thesis statement. This can help in maintaining a strong central argument throughout the essay.
Task Achievement
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Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, framing the argument well and effectively summarizing your points.
Task Achievement
You clearly address the task, discussing both the causes of rural to urban migration and its negative effects on cities and rural areas.
Task Achievement
You've provided relevant examples, such as the situation in Jakarta, to support your arguments, which strengthens your essay.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
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