in some culture children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard what are the advantages and disadvantages of giving the children this message?
There is no denying the
fact
that children
’s motivation
is essential. This
essay will discuss advantages
and disadvantages of telling Correct article usage
the advantages
children
that they
able to reach anything if they try hard enough.
Add a verb
they are
they were
To begin
with, there are many advantages for children
Change noun form
children's
motivation
. Firstly
, encouragement is crucial for children
to achieve what they want to have. In other word
, these Change the wording
another word
other words
children
sometimes plan to have high score
in school and by Fix the agreement mistake
scores
motivation
and encouragement, they will have high score
. Fix the agreement mistake
scores
In addition
, these encouragements are positively affecting child’s
enthusiasm towards having new things. Correct article usage
a child’s
For example
, some parents are motivating their children
to collect their money and to buy what they want from it. In fact
, this
is a great way to motivate children
in saving
money
In terms of demerit, not all dreams can be achieved. It is Change preposition
to save
also
possible to say that this
fake motivation
can lead to huge frustrating
from Replace the word
frustration
children
. In fact
, family
should not Add an article
the family
a family
over motivate
their Add a hyphen
over-motivate
children
if they really know that
their Correct word choice
apply
children
ability to tackle the tasks. Change noun form
children's
For example
, some parents are negatively motivating their children
to lose weight, while
in fact
the child is surrounded by different unhealthy food options. Thus
, this
type of motivation
is supposed to be evaluated by parents or schoolteacher
carefully before applying it to the child.
In conclusion, there are many merits of telling Fix the agreement mistake
schoolteachers
children
that they are capable to achieve
anything if they work hard on it. It is Change preposition
of achieving
also
true that there are many disadvantages of false motivation
that lead to negative effect
.Fix the agreement mistake
effects
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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to illustrate points better. For instance, when discussing how motivation can lead to achievements, giving a detailed story or scenario could make the argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the cohesion by using a wider range of linking words. This will ensure a smoother transition between points and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The introduction sets the stage for the discussion by clearly stating the topic and outlining the essay's direction, which is effective in establishing context.
task achievement
The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages, providing a balanced view of the topic. This shows a good understanding of the essay question.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...